Angels

Chapter 10: Preparing for Tour

It was 2 days before our tour trip and I was out shopping with Ash, Doris, and Lisa. I had a hair appointment at a salon with Doris late afternoon to get our dye jobs fixed up before the tour, and Lisa and Ash insisted on taking us clothes shopping so that we'd look 'hot, sexy and down-right gorgeous' on stage. Like we don't already??

Doris and I kept throwing each other looks as they dragged us into stores to look at clothes and they were the ones that came out with bags of clothes. Eventually, we entered a thrift store and Doris found all kinds of cool shirts, jackets, and bottoms that she liked as well as some seriously sexy underwear.

She looked at me with a smirk as she paid for her things, "Nothing says 'rockstar' like used panties. I fully intend to get laid at every stop on this tour, and I want to be prepared for when I do."

I simply nodded like an idiot and they dragged me into another, much larger thrift store. Doris, Ash and Lisa's eyes widen and they all scatter in different directions grabbing clothes and giggling like morons as they dragged me to the fitting rooms. Garter belts, sleeveless denim jackets, ripped jeans, bustier tops, crop tops, miniskirts in a variety of materials, knee-length skirts (for 'relaxing in'), bustier dresses, high heels and thigh high boots; basically, I was drowning in sexy gothic clothes.

"WHY?" I cried underneath the mountain.

"Because my dear Devin, there is an unspoken realization amongst all of us that you are the new sex appeal of the band," Doris smirked, "so we need to dress and market you that way since Colin has officially lost his place."

"I am NOT the band's sex appeal!" I huffed.

"Not according to Twitter," Ashley said, pulling out her phone to read tweets, " 'That new guitarist is sexy as hell, I'd come to a concert again just to see her' says one dude. And here's one from a girl, 'I thought I was straight, but the new guitarist for Nightmaradeen is making me question that conclusion #hotasfuck'. And there are plenty more where they came from honey. You are officially sex appeal on a stick."

I felt the color drain from my face and they laughed as they took the clothes to the checkout and swiped my debit card. We went our separate ways for a while as Doris and I went to the salon. I was getting silver hair this time around and Doris was swapping her green tips for burgundy. We looked at each other with approval and she took my hand and led me to her tattoo artists parlor.

I looked at her confused and she looked nervous as she said, "I've been a bitch to you. I can see the way Colin looks at you even if you can't and I need to respect that he's never gonna see me as more than his little sister in his band. I want us to start over as friends, and to commemorate the occasion and serve as a reminder to myself if I ever get bitchy about it, let's get the Ying and Yang tattoo's on our hands. Simple yet meaningful."

I find myself nodding and giving her a hug which she returns eagerly. After 30 minutes we're walking out of there with one half of the Ying and Yang symbol on each other's hands. We meet up with Lisa and Ashley at a restaurant to eat and we decide to have a girls night out tonight, starting at 10 pm. Ash and I headed home to get changed. I  on threw on a white tank top over my black lace bra, a black miniskirt, some black ankle peep-toe heels and a red plaid shirt. I put my hair into a messy bun and my phone buzzed with a text. It was Colin.

'I've got some new songs I want you to look at.' was all it said.

'I'm going out with the girls tonight, it'll have to wait.' I replied.

I went downstairs with Ash and met up with Lisa and Doris and we hit the town. We started at a bar nearby where a bunch of guys kept buying our rounds of shots. Doris disappeared early with one of them and we never saw her again, so Lisa, Ash and I made our way to Starlight where we danced and drank the night away. Matt turned up to pick up Ash and he took her home and Lisa disappeared with the very handsome bartender a little while earlier. Matt offered to take me home along with Ash but I wasn't ready to leave yet. When the club closed at 3 am I found myself incredibly drunk and having to walk 3 miles home. I was catching my breath when I felt a hand gently touch my shoulder. I turned around; Colin.

"Come on Kitten, I'll let you sleep at my place since it's close by," he said, putting an arm around my waist and guiding me in the direction of his apartment.

"How'd you know I was here?" I asked, clinging to his arm for balance.

"Matt texted me saying you might need rescuing from Starlight," he explained, "he said guys were practically undressing you with their eyes and some were even trying. I didn't believe that last part until I saw you boot one guy who shoved his hand up your skirt. I was about ready to feed him his teeth. You need to be more careful."

As he said this we were entering the entrance of his apartment and I could see several beer cans on his coffee table.

"Drinking alone dear?" I commented, gesturing to the cans.

"I was hoping you and I would be working on songs tonight so I got extra beer in," he explained, "when you told me you were going out I decided to get drunk on my own."

I laughed as I took off my jacket and collapsed onto his couch. He sat down next to me and pulled me onto his lap. I could smell beer and whiskey on his breath mingling with his cologne. His gaze wandered down my body and he bit his lip before looking away. His fingers traced circles on my upper thigh and I tensed up. I stood up and moved to his kitchen where I found a half-empty bottle of whiskey. I helped myself to the liquor and felt him press up behind me. The lights in the apartment suddenly went out. A blackout?! Now?!

Colin used his phone as a torch and lit up some candles around the apartment, making the atmosphere very warm and intimate. I downed more whiskey to calm my nerves and I heard Colin getting changed in the next room. He came into the kitchen wearing nothing but his sweatpants and he grabbed two wine glasses and a bottle of red wine from his fridge.

"Come on, let's sit in the living room while we wait for the power to be restored," he said in a deep, husky tone.

I followed him through and we sat down on his couch again. He pulled me up against him and I sat curled up against his chest. We drank in silence for a while until I felt his hand moving down south towards my more sensitive regions. He moved his fingers in such a way that made me gasp and moan simultaneously.

He pressed his lips to my ear and said, "You have no idea how horny I am right now just by looking at you kitten, and I can tell by how wet you are that you're horny too. How about we keep this between us and we have some fun? Just this once?"

I bit my lip and nodded. He began trailing kisses down my neck as he turned me to face him. It was empty, shallow and raw, purely physical action that occurred in every room of his apartment that night, but I could tell it was what we both needed. It felt amazing. Colin really knew what he was doing. He knew when to be gentle and when to be rough, but every now and then I thought of Adam. Was it guilt that I was feeling because I'd hooked up with him a few days prior? But why? I wasn't committed to either of these men, and I wasn't likely to be either. So why the guilt? Is it because I'm not happy sleeping with my bandmates? I feel like a slut. I'm so ashamed of myself right now.

As soon as we were both spent, we lay looking at the ceiling trying to catch our breath. I felt dirty and disgusting and shallow. I sat up and started getting ready.

"Where are you going?" Colin asked, genuinely surprised.

"I'm going home," I say flatly, not looking at him.

"Why? It's late, the power is out, just stay the night," he listed, pulling me back down onto the bed as I put my underwear back on.

He climbed on top of me and studied my face. I looked away expressionless.

He sighed and said, "You regret this don't you?"

I say nothing and he looks away before lying next to me and pulling me close and whispering, "Tonight has been amazing Devin, I haven't had such wild sex in a long time, so I thank you. I can see you regret this probably because I'm your bandmate or you think you're a slut for doing this or maybe both, but you're not a slut and things like this are normal in bands. We're both consenting adults, Devin, it's normal for things like this to happen."

I nod with tears in my eyes which he wipes away while giving a gentle smile. I snuggle into him as he strokes my hair and we both fall into a deep, blissful sleep...