Feelings Are Gross

I hate the guilt I constantly feel,
And the pain that I can't seem to deal.
I hate that my heart can't move on,
Despite the fact that you're gone.
But most of all, I hate that I still love you.

I hate that what I used to love
My heart now wants to get rid of.
And I hate that I can't look at my best friend
Knowing that this feeling will fail to end.
But most of all, I hate that I still love you.

I hate that when I look in the mirror
I feel nothing but guilt and fear
I hate that now I see
Someone I've never wanted to be
But most of all, I hate that I still love you.
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   I wrote this poem last year, as a sophomore. It's not one of my best poems, but I feel it deserved to be the first one. This poem made me come to realize my love for poetry. I know I'm not fantastic at it, but it's definitely something I want to work on and continue improving.
    This poem was dedicated to a boy who I thought I was madly in love with. And I do believe I was. This poem describes the way I felt when faced with, what I presumed to be at the time, rejection.
   I'm not sure exactly if this one is 100% relatable, but if there is anyway you can relate to this poem please let me know! I'm sharing these poems in hopes to connect with people and create a friendly, open community. I really hope you will share your thoughts/opinions on poems you can relate to or even if you'd give some feedback. (:
  
THANK YOU (: