Feelings Revealed in Crimson Flames

It's Now or Never

           

  He wanted to tell the girl how much he loved her, but time was becoming increasingly sparse. Their gang that withstood many trials and new-found glories, would soon disperse into reality, blossoming into independent and successful individuals. Celebrating the last few moments they had with one another, the crew, plannned for a two-week refuge to the nearest campsite. Jude knew that if he didn't confess to her over the time approaching, that he may never catch her, and she could potentially leave Point Place to pursue a dream belonging in the big city. Gwendolyn, possessing baby blue eyes that could still any raging storm, and her black hair lay long and wild. One of a free, open spirit and seeming to be the most compassionate person he had ever met, the girl had most definitely stolen his heart, with her love of worlds that only lived within the pages of books and her constant thirst for knowledge. As he thought of her contagious smile and the way she manipulated his heartstrings, he knew that he wouldn't leave empty-handed.

  His soul filled with anticipation as the departure date grew closer and closer to the present. He crammed his canvas bag with all the necessities that he would need for the upcoming week and prepared himself for the road trip with nine other hyperactive, new-coming adults like himself. He took a shower, letting the cold-water cascade down his body, waking up his clouded mind and rejuvenating his senses. Making sure not to waste an unnecessary amount of water, Jude jumped out after thoroughly cleaning every inch of his body in a lovely fragrance of Old Spice. He dried his shaggy, auburn hair as he searched for an outfit decent enough to meet his friends. After tossing through a pile of clothes on the floor, he settled on an olive, button-down shirt paired with a brown, faux leather jacket, charcoal colored, skinny jeans, and a pair of brown, moccasin shoes. His hair lay atop his head in his normal disheveled look, not putting very much effort into it. Considering the mirror one last time, Jude stroked his jawline, his icy, blue eyes examining his features from different perspectives. Being impressed with his appearance, he left the room with his luggage, a smirk, and anticipation for the adventure ahead.

  Him and the gang had planned on meeting at a local convenient store in Point Place, so that is where Jude intended to go. He straddled his bike while fitting his helmet onto himself. A smile spread across his face once the engine ignited and before he knew it, he was rolling down the road. As he whirled passed houses and apartment complexes, Jude's mind wandered to Gwendolyn. He feared that he would lose his last opportunity to express just how strongly his feelings had developed over the years. He wanted to show her off to the world as his most important success in life. He wanted to hold her and comfort her whenever she felt like everything was falling apart. He wanted to encourage her to accomplish whatever her heart intended, and he wanted her to be a part of his life, through the successes and failures, as well. He knew deep down in his heart, she was the one for him. She encouraged him to do amazing things and grow as a person. She was everything that he wanted to aspire to be. He just hoped that she would return his feelings wholeheartedly, yet it would be quite risky.

  Jude was the first to arrive at the nearby convenient store, so he went in to purchase a coffee and something to fuel him until lunchtime. He opened the door, revealing a low amount of business. The bell on the door interrupted the smooth routine of the few people in there, but they soon turned, not being interested in the guy who just walked in. Jude trotted among the petite store with accuracy, not looking for anything in particular. He settled on a simple cup of black coffee with sugar paired with a chocolate glazed, yeast doughnut. He thanked the woman at the register before flashing a breathtaking smile and returning to his motorcycle. The autumn air was cold, yet that did not seem to effect the beauty that came with the changing seasons. The leaves traveled atop the air, sending them far off into foreign locations. He was blinded by the lights of an approaching vehicle, a Volkswagen. It parked a little ways beyond where his bike was residing and came to a complete halt before becoming lifeless. He watched as people fled from inside the car. His face lit up and his smile only grew. The crew fled out, by twos and threes, leaving the caravan vacant and empty. He approached his close friends one by one, giving them a brief greeting and hug. Jude thought that he was certainly prepared, however his mind and heart hadn't quite made the adjustment. She was here, his bohemian goddess, Gwendolyn McCabe.

  They stood there together, watching, looking into each other's eyes. It seemed as if they were the only two people in the universe. Jude admired her natural beauty, so radiant and raw of beauty. She stood there with a goofy grin watching as the guy stood daydreaming with his mouth agape. She snapped her fingers and waved her hand in his line of vision in an attempt to break him from his wandering. Although her movements were continuous, it helped to no avail. She decided to yell at him, awakening him from his 'fools trance'. He jerked from surprise, realizing what had happened, and a red color soon spread to his cheeks. He glanced around him and noticed that the rest of the gang had dispersed from Gwen and himself, entering back into the caravan. Gwen gave him a sweet smile before turning and walking toward the van to join the rest. Jude stood alone, reflecting over the time ahead. He took a deep breath, running his hands through his unruly hair before following in the direction of the van. Jude sat in the very back of the van, to the left was Gwendolyn and the window was located to his right. He turned his head toward the window, watching the trees and cottages pass his vision, his mind fogged over and filled with hyperactive thoughts and feelings. All around him, the gang carried on with private conversations, cutting up and carrying on, but his mind was a million miles away from this moving vehicle, away from this place.

  They arrived sooner than Jude had expected, but Gwen had told him that he had fallen asleep not too long into the forty-five-minute drive. All ten members of the crew escaped the claustrophobic space, stretching their muscles when they were on the ground. The five men set up the tents and living quarters while the women dispersed to explore the camping ground and the necessities such as the bath house, information booth, trash drop off, and the huge lake along with the open hours. After exploring and struggling to set up a place to sleep, the gang finally came back with a status report for each task. The exploration was labeled victorious, yet the men's work was labeled lousy. The women and men worked together to build the living spaces. It took a rough estimate of about ten to fifteen minutes, but after the building was established the next task was stocking. The crew brought out all the credentials and placed them into their designated spots. Each tent consisted of two individuals, the men being with either their girlfriends' or with their close friend. Jude was staying with Gwendolyn, cliché. After all the tasks were done in an attempt to prepare for the upcoming stay, the sun was beginning to give up his shift to the moon. The group separated by gender, going to the bath houses and readying themselves to spend a decent amount of time around the campfire, celebrating their last annual bonding as best friends. However, Jude knew that as soon as this opportunity was revealed, it would fly by right before his blue orbs.

  Jude looked around at his friends, the people who impacted the past four years so much more than they could ever understand. Before, he was just a naive boy who thought that he was at a higher air than everyone else, he was a smart ass, and this group had formed, which was the best thing that could have ever happened to him. As the fire cracked, the group hushed to whispers, which gave Jude the perfect time to confess to Gwendolyn. He cleared his throat, gaining glances from everyone circled around him. He took this reaction as fuel to move forward. Jude turned to the right, facing Gwendolyn with hope and fear in his eyes, he took her petite, fragile, pale hands in his own, and urged his voice to fill the stillness around him, "Gwen, I don't think you understand just how much your presence has impacted me as much as it has." She looked up at him with doe eyes. He continued forward, "You being in my life, has made me prosper and dedicate myself to becoming a better person." He smiled warmly at her, "I have always had this small fascination for you ever since that moment in first period when you said 'Why do you always looks so hateful? If you were to smile you would be even more handsome.' No one has ever called me out with such confidence like that." He sighed, "I just wanted to let you know, before you left and I would never see you again, that I love you, with all my heart, and I want to spend my life with you, Gwendolyn."

  She looked up at Jude, face ridden with fresh tears as she sat there unable to produce any type of response imaginable. He misinterpreted her silence as rejection and he took the alternative to distance himself from her, protecting himself from getting hurt. However, he moved away just to be pulled back to her. The kiss reminded him of a chemistry lesson in school, when if the right two elements were put together, they'd explode.

  She spoke, almost so softly that Jude had to strain to hear, "You have no idea how long I've been waiting for you, Jude. I love you too. They enveloped each other in an intimate embrace, watching the fire. The crew around cheered and discussed winning and losing bets, declaring a wonderful occurrence. All the while, little did Jude know, a girl sitting across the blazing fire, had just gotten her heart broken. He didn't understand just how much he affected her, but he would know before she abandoned his life forever.