I feel like they all lie to my face
I feel like a bad friend
I feel worthless
I feel confused
I feel mute
I feel like nothing where to change if I was not born
I feel sad
Sometimes I feel nothing
I feel like pity is my definition
I am ugly
I am pitied
I am worth nothing more than my broken expections
I am expected to be perfect
I starve myself at lunch not for the lack of money for the lack of self love
That is probably why I will never love anyone more than a friend
They call be skin and bones
That's not what I see
They say eat
I say I'm not hungry
They say you're perfect
I say no one is
They say I want to be you
I say why
I say I'm nothing
I say I'm not perfect
I say I'm not a good friend
I say nor a good influence
I say I lie and I wish I didn't
My life is not perfect nor semi perfect
Your family criticizes you
They call you stupid without even realizing it. I REALLY TRY BUT I CAN'T SEEM TO DO ANYTHING RIGHT.
I WON'T TOUCH ANYTHING BECAUSE ANYTHING I TOUCH DISAPPEARS.
I AM NOTHING MORE THAN AN EMOTIONAL PUNCHING BAG. I GET IN THE WAY AND WHEN I DO I GET HURT. JUST LEAVE ME TO DIE... IT'S NOT LIKE IT WILL MAKE A DIFFERENCE. I WILL JUST GROW UP TO BE A FALIURE A FUCKING FAILURE. I AM A DUMB FALIURE IS THE ONLY THING AM. I WILL NEVER GROW UP TO BE WHAT I DREAM TO BE. TO MOST PEOPLE SAY I WILL GROW UP TO BE A FALIURE AND THEY ARE ALL RIGHT. I AM JUST A MISTAKE, A DISAPPOINTMENT TO MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY. I CAN'T SEEM TO DO GET MY GRADES UP, GET SKINNIER, TO SUCCEED, I CAN'T SEEM TO DO ANYTHING BUT FAIL! FAIL! FAIL! FAIL! BUT I JUST HAD TO FAKE A SMILE AND FORCE A LAUGH BECAUSE NO ONE WILL CARE BECAUSE FROM WHAT I LEARNED THEY ALL DON'T SEEM TO CARE!!THEY SAY YOU'RE PERFECT!!IF I'M SO PERFECT THEN WHY DO I JUST KEEP DISSAPOINTING EVERYONE!! WHY DO I JUST FAIL AT EVERYTHING!! WHY AM I EVEN TRYING!! WHY IS EVERYONE SO FAR AHEAD WHEN I'M FAR BEHIND!! SOME ARE STUCK IN THE PAST AND FUTURE BUT I'M IN THE HATED PRESENT AND I TRY TO HOLD ON TO SANITY AND THIS IS THE ONE PLACE I GO TO TO LET IT ALL OUT BECAUSE NO ONE CARES ABOUT ME!!! I HAVE TO CARE FOR MYSELF! MY PARENTS ONLY CARE ABOUT ME WHEN MY SIBLINGS ARE GONE BUT WHEN THEIR THERE... I'm invisible... they tell me to do something to get me out of the room they are in and not care about me! SURE THEY ASK HOW WAS YOUR DAY BUT THAT'S IT BUT SOMETIMES THEY ARE NOT AROUND!! I NEVER REALLY SEE MY MOM AND MY STEP DAD AND ACTUAL DAD ARE IN CALIFORNIA WHILE I'M IN A PLACE I ACTUALLY LOVE THAT IS GETTING TAKEN FROM ME... I WILL JUST END UP BEING ALONE AT THE NEW SCHOOL BECAUSE I'M DUMB AND I NEVER TRY BECAUSE ACCORDING TO SOME PEOPLE I AM JUST A LAZY PIECE OF SHIT!!! I GO PLACES WITH MY FAMILY BUT NEVER TALK TO THEM UNLESS IT'S FOR THERE CRITISIZIM!!! I AM JUST A DUMB GIRL!!! BUT I AM NEVER GOING TO BE CARED ABOUT UNLESS IT'S FOR A FAVOR. JULISSA YOU LAZY PIECE OF SHIT FIND SOMETHING TO DO FOR YOUR NON EXISTENT LIFE GET YOUR FUCKING HEAD OUT OF THE CLOUDS YOU ARE NOTHING MORE THAN A STUPID MISTAKE WHO DIDN'T MAKE A DIFFERENCE, YOUR A DISAPPOINTMENT, YOUR FAMILY THINKS DIFFERENTLY OF YOU BECAUSE YOU SUPPORT GAY, THEY ALL THINK YOU ARE JUST A LAZY LITTLE UNSUCCESSFUL GIRL THAT DOESN'T UNDERSTAND SHIT!!! YOU WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND BECAUSE YOU ARE NOTHING!!!! NOTHING MORE THAN PITIED!!! Your friends will just forget you once you leave, why? Because you were never a good friend and you are just forgetful they say they are sad but later they will just forget you...
