Poems ,short stories and songs

Train platform

I know it isn't you
I know that you tried
But it's ripping out my heart
And leaving a hole deep inside

I wish I could try to hide it
But you'd know straight away
You'd stop walking away
And come home to me straight away
But I'd know you wouldn't want to stay

I can't be selfish
No not today
So for your happinesss this burden I must pay

I feel like i can't breath
As you board your train
I'm trying not to cry
And if I do you wouldn't see
I'd make sure you turn the other way

I can't hold you back
You've wanted this to long
Just because my hearts breaking
Doesn't mean I should drag yours along

It's the end game for me
And deep inside I know it's true
As you speed away
Leaving me battered and bruised

You are sweet and too kind
I know you didn't mean to
Make me cry
But I couldn't let you waste your life here with me instead

I'm frozen in time
My hearts skipping beats
In an empty platform
Someone shouts "She's not breathing!"

I'm on the floor now
The rain beating down
Its as if your crying already
As you comfort me on the ground

I can smell you all around
I see you in my eye
But when i blink my eyes open
I know it's all in my mind

People are touching me now
And it's the one thing I hate
To be touched without permission
But I can't swipe them away

My eyelids are heavy
My heartbeats slowing down
Everyone's in panic
Gasping at the girl on the ground

I close my eyes
And count down from ten
I really wish you were there
I count down the things I like about you instead

10)I love the way you smile
Like your the only light
9)for all the times you stayed for awhile,and you were my light
8)for the sing songs we had,in my car
7)the way you laughed

6)when we made jokes about getting hitched
5)for how you dance when you get hyped,like when I told you I'd ordered takeaway tonight
4)for the way your hair curls around your eyes

3)for the time I wanted to tie the knot,but could say the right words
To my whole world
2)for how you blushed bright red when I said you were hot
1)you as a whole,I love you do you love me or not?

Strangers surround me
And theirs a thousand places I want to go
I've never felt so alone

I watched you walk away
I lost my world that day
So now I close my eyes
And I cried

I felt salty tears on my face
From the strangers around me
But then a man stood up and exclaimed me dead for the world to see