I Hate Tadhana

Chapter Six || Cover

~ Aubrey ~

"Hi guys. You've might have noticed na I'm off my social medias. I'm sure nakita niyo yung Instagram ni Ryder. Yes, we've broken up. He's officially dating another girl. Yes, it's Monique. My father has recently died too. You guys deserve to know what's happening in my life. Thank you for sticking up for me. For now, I want some privacy. I'll be off the Internet for awhile. Here's a song I dedicate for you guys." Sabi ko, tears streaming down my cheeks. I wiped them off and took my guitar. I started strumming the chords.

Gotta change my answering machine, now that I'm alone
'Cause right now it says that "We can't come to the phone"
And I know it makes no sense, 'cause you walked out the door
But it's the only way I hear your voice anymore

I feel some tears streaming on my cheeks. Di ko pinigilan and just let it fall. Sanay naman ako mahulog na walang sumasalo.

It's been months and for some reason I just
(Can't get over us)
And I'm stronger than this
No more walking round with my head down
I'm so over being blue, crying over you

Sana ganon kadali. Alam kong sa sarili ko, kaya ko lagpasan 'to. Kaso ang sakit eh. Sobrang sakit. Just a simple reminder of them makes my heart ache and my head dizzy.

And I'm so sick of love songs, so tired of tears
So done with wishing you were still here
Said I'm so sick of love songs, so sad and slow
So why can't I turn off the radio?

You know why I chose this song? I'm literally sick of love songs. Reminding me that I don't have that love anymore. As the song says, why can't I turn off the radio?

Gotta fix that calendar I have that's marked July 15th
Because since there's no more you, there's no more anniversary
I'm so fed up with my thoughts of you and your memory
And now every song reminds me of what used to be

Napaka-ironic. July din anniversary namin. Sobrang relatable sa akin 'tong kanta. It's making my heart ache.

That's the reason I'm
So sick of love songs, so tired of tears
So done with wishing you were still here
Said I'm so sick of love songs, so sad and slow
So why can't I turn off the radio?

Masaya kaya silang dalawa? Are they guilty of hurting me? Of course not. Kasi kung guilty sila, they're supposed to be apologizing. Na-realize kaya nila ngayon kung gaano kasakit yung nararanasan ko ngayon?

Leave me alone
(Stupid love songs)
Don't make me think about his smile
Or having my first child
Let it go

The bridge speaks to me. It's like this song was made for me. Ang saklap ng buhay ko. Di patas ang tadhana. Why do I get to cry and they get to smile?

After strumming the last chords. I covered my face. Humikbi ako ng humikbi dahil hindi ko napigilan. Inabot ko yung camera and stopped recording. Tuluyan ako umiyak ng umiyak. Ni hindi ko nga nagawa yung flying kisses ko.

You know why I recorded this? 'I still support you Aubrey! Even through your worst, nandito ako. Stay strong.' A fan replied in my last tweet which was about going away for awhile. I was so touched. My fans deserve to know what's happening in my life.