Be My Superwomen

Chapter 4

Sleeping last night was the hardest thing in the world until I finally crashed. I had already decided I wasn't going to school. With every event that happened yesterday, im not sure that I even want to see anyone. I hadn't left my room all day. I haven't even eaten and it had already been 2:15 pm. What have I done today? Nothing but sulk and sleep all day. There had been nothing better. Nothing worth my time either and I sure as hell wasn't in any type of mood to find something that was.

My house was completely silent except for the sound of the wind pounding against my window. Then suddenly I heard a door close. Of course it wasn't my parents. They're never here. It had to have been Rosa. She had been my nanny since I was about 15. She had always taken care of me and if there was anyone I cared about the most it would be her.

I looked around the house as I worked my way down to the kitchen to get something to eat. I really didn't even feel like eating. But as soon as I got to the kitchen, Rosa was there finishing up my favorite, quesadilla's.

"Hey hunny. I made your favorite." She said. HER uncertain smile had made it clear that she suspected something already. "I see you didn't go to school today. Were you sick? I came to check on you when I got back yesterday, but you had already been asleep. "

"Nah I wasn't sick. Something had came up. "

"Nina you've been sleep all day. I already know you. What happened yesterday? I know you were crying. All that tissue on the floor wasn't from nothing. "

"Me and Aaron broke up. I just really don't want to talk about it. "

"Well, if it was meant to last it would've sweetheart. You already know how I feel about that boy. If you want to talk about it later just call me. Im going to finish up dinner but take a few, you haven't eaten all day. "

Rosa... Man what could I even say. Rosa always looks out for me. As soon as Aaron started changing she was the first person to notice. She always let me know how he wasn't treating me right but I was always too love struck to listen. That was until it had been too late and he had already started putting his hands on me. I never told her about him beating on me but I always felt like there was a chance she suspected it but just never said anything because she wasn't sure. I wasn't planning on telling her, or anyone really. I took my plate to my room and sat on the couch while surfing through my facebook newsfeed. I wasn't sure what my mood was. I just had been completely numb.

Knock knock

I heard a knocking sound but didn't know where it had been coming from. I swore up and down it had been knocking on the door from the show that was playing on my 60" television. Then it happened again. The raspy sound of someones voice lingered in my head. I went to the sliding doors of my balcony and opened the curtain, revealing his face. Aaron. The one person I had truly and utterly hated to see at the moment. I slid open the door and just stood there for a moment speechless.

"Baby please, just let me explain. I texted and called you like a billion times last night. The least you can do is let me explain. "

"Get out!"

"No! I swear it wasn't even like that! She kept trying to get on me and I kept pushing her off. "

"Im not an idiot Aaron! You know im not!"

"You know she's a slut! All she did was give me head. I didn't ask for it I swear. She just started doing it and then a minute later you was right outside of the car. You know I would never cheat on you Leilani. "

"You let her do it! Theres no way in hell she would be able to take your dick out without you knowing. As soon as she did that you were automatically cheating. On top of that she was still giving you head right in front of my face!"

"I love you Leilani! You know I do. "

"No Aaron. You don't. "

"How could you even say that? We've been together for over a year already. I love you more than anything Leilani I swear on my life. "

"Get out."

"No. Not until you listen. "

"Get the fuck out Aaron!"

"Fine, but let me say this first. I love you more than you would even possibly understand. I know I haven't been treating you right. You deserve way more than what i've given. You mean the world to me. I'll never put my hands on you again. I guess I just get so angry that I just take it out on you. I tried not to touch you for a while and succeeded but yesterday just really wasn't my day and im so so so sorry for that baby. You're the only thing I have left to be happy about. Even though I don't show it, you're the only person I think about all day. So much goes on that you don't even know about and stress just builds up and I take it out ob you. The last thing that I would want is to lose you. You're my world and I promise i'll make all this up to you. Just please take me back... Please. I love you so much. You're the only person I could even imagine myself being with. "

I didn't even know what to say. I know how this goes and its just like the movies. I'll just take him back and then a while later it will all happen all over again ten times worse. I refuse to be the dumb girls who always take their abuser back. But at the same time I couldn't help but look at him and see the emotions written on his face. He was on his knees holding me by my waist begging for me back. I've never seen him so vulnerable. I don't think anyone has. I was numb. Stuck. I didn't know what to do. I looked down at him and he looked in my eyes. His deep brown eyes filled with tears staring up at me only made me feel worse about my decision to let him go. As soon as I saw the tears drip down his cheek a million more dripped down mine. Was this the right descision? He stood up and we were face to face. The salty taste of my tears was the only flavor left on my lips.

"I love you baby. I'll never hurt you again. I'll die before I ever do, I promise. " He cried.

He grabbed me into the most sorrowful hug in my life. We held each other and cried in each others arms. I didn't want to let him go and I know he didn't either. But I wasn't going to let it happen like this. I refused to be that girl.

"Y-you have to leave Aaron. Im sorry, I cant take you back."

I pulled away from him. The tears were flowing harder for not only me but him too. I couldn't even look at him anymore. I just wanted it to be over, and now.

The sounds of his sobs had filled my room. He looked in my eyes one more time before stroking my cheek and kissing my lips. He pulled away and studied my face once more before wiping the left over tears off my face.

"I'll never stop loving you. I'll find a way to make everything up to you. Im never going to stop trying to get you back. "

That was the last thing he said before I turned away from him. I couldn't take the sight of his face any longer. As soon as I heard my bedroom door close, I fell to the floor. I felt hollow. I climbed in bed and once again cried myself to sleep.