Lost Girls and Boys Club

Chpt 1:Alone, surrounded

I sat on the old rusty swing, it creaked and I swang while I was Skyping Connor. "I don't know, She says it's better for me." I said, disappointed. "I say it's a bunch of shit" Connor spat, "Pfft Tell me about it." I scoffed, his blond curly hair and soft green eyes made my anxiety a little better..I didn't know how I was going to handle moving away from him.

"At least it's a new school and you won't be trapped in Westfield.. yuck" He said with a bitter tone, "But I won't have you.. or Halie." I sadly said, "You'll be okay, Your strong okay?" "Maybe with you I am.. but not on my own." I said, my voice shaking occasionally. "Ill visit you all the the time and we can call everyday except for swim days." He said, I wanted to cry.. I had to leave my best friends.

My aunt called for me. "Vivien! Come eat." She yelled, "Shit, I gotta go." I said, "Okay But make sure u call me later, okay?" He said, "Of course. Bye Bye." I wheezed, "Bye Bye? you sound like a kindergartner, Bye." He scolded me, he chuckled and hung up. I always have loved his laugh..."Vivien! Your food is getting cold!" My aunt screamed from the house, obviously pissed. Be right there!" I exclaimed, I jumped off the swing, and ran across the street to my apartment building.

It was small, and old. But it was home and I was going to miss it... A new house just sounds foreign. My aunt didn't have much money, her job was to keep the heat going in the winter and keep Holly and I in school.

Holly jumped out in front of the door. "What's the password?" Holly exclaimed enthusiastically, I pushed her aside. "I'm hungry." I spat, "That's not correct, try again soon." She giggled, I walked past her and into the Living room. "What are we eating?" I asked, she looked at me with sad eyes, "Green beans.." she said with a false smile, smiling always was her way of trying to cheer herself up. "Yum!" she exclaimed, she Looked at me and gave a small smile. She handed me a plate with a small pile of green beans, about as much you would give a baby.

Holly eyed me, "I thought you hated green beans?.." She said sadly, "They're okay, plus I'm hungry. I missed dinner last night." I said, my voice shaking a little. "Maybe you shouldn't stay out late being emo then." she spat, "Okay, maybe you should mind your own business!" I scolded her, I wanted to scream at her... she didn't understand why I cut myself or went on walks in the cold.

My aunt looked at her "Holly, leave her alone, One decent dinner is all I'm asking for." She nodded at me, "Let's Just eat okay? How was school Viv?" "It was fucking torture." Holly's eyes widened. "Excuse me, we do not use that language. Understood?" She scolded me, I rolled my eyes and Dropped my fork on the floor. "Whoops, must've slipped." I spat. She scoffed, "What has gotten into you?" She exclaimed, clearly upset. I looked at Holly, scared and sunk into her chair, she looked like a scared puppy. I picked up the fork and my eyes met my aunts sad eyes again. "Look I'm sorry, I'll stop.. Im just tired." I said, "I'm sorry that your tired but that doesn't make it okay to be mean to us.." Auntie said, "I know.. I said I was sorry." I shrugged, It was silent as we ate for a few minutes. I took my last bite of green beans. "I'm going to go upstairs, call me if you need me." I said my salutations, and left. Both of them shook their heads in synch. I walked into the Hall and up the creaky stained stairs. I needed to talk to Connor asap. He had swim in a few minutes though, I knew he was in the car. I grabbed my headphones and opened my phone case. I grabbed the razor hidden in it. I put Mockingbird on and let the lyrics fill my ears. "Hailey I Know you miss your mom, and I know you miss your dad when I'm gone but I'm trying to give you the life I never had." -Eminem. I held back my tears and slid the blade across my arm, it made me numb from sadness until it started to sting. I held the cut and started to tear up. I felt crazy but I was talking to nobody.. "I can't do this, I can't." I felt smothered by my thoughts. I wanted to just end it all.

Hey this story is pretty sad, Sorry Holly 😂 And Marissa if your reading this. I'll keep adding parts until I think it should come to an end. Thank you💗! This story is for my suicidal best friend. I love you and so do many others.