Aftermath // h.s

Chapter 1

MAJOR TRIGGER WARNING

It started in your apartment. Quarter to three in the afternoon as you got home from your early class at the university. You were walking down the corridor, only a couple steps away from your door. Your key was in your hand, your arm was reaching out. So. Fucking. Close. If you had been one minute earlier, maybe you would have made it. You could ask as many 'what if' questions as you wanted, but there was no way to turn back time and make it not happen. It wasn't over after he pulled out and walked away though. It was long from over.

"(Y/N)," one of the special victim's unit officers said softly, coming over to sit next to you on the couch in your apartment. "I'm detective Roland, can you try and tell me what happened?"

When did you call the police? Did you call the police? Or did a neighbor?

"Uhm... I just... I was just getting home from uni..." Your eyebrows kitted together. It all seemed like such a blur all of a sudden. "And I was just getting to my apartment and... and they grabbed me..."

"Okay," the detective nodded. "Did you see anything? The colour of their skin, facial hair... do you remember any smells?"

"I don't know.... I think they were white," you shook your head, narrowing your eyes as you tried to think. "I don't know I wasn't facing him..."

"Did they say anything to you?" she asked. "Anything to identify them as a man or woman?"

"It was a guy... definitely a guy," you breathed out. "He said... 'is this how you like it?'... and I can't remember anything else." Your voice cracked and you wrapped your arms around yourself. A protective move. You didn't know anything in your home. You didn't know their motives. To say your trust was shattered was an understatement. You had seen so many instances where nothing could be done, and the person who had been attacked was left to live a life of paranoia. You just sat there wishing that no one had been called.

What would the people in your life think about this? Your parents, your boyfriend, your friends? How would they be able to look at you the same way after knowing what had happened?

"We want to get your down to the hospital and have a rape kit done okay?" the detective said calmly after she had finished writing everything down. "They're going to do a search of your apartment, see if they can find any DNA. It happened in the hallway, but he could have left something on you... Do you still have the clothes you were in when it happened?"

You were wearing them. "I'm wearing them."

"That means you didn't have a shower afterwards?"

"No..."

"Good... I'm going to come with you to the hospital, alright? Is there anyone we can call to meet us there?"

"Yeah... Harry... my boyfriend," you murmured, fishing your phone out of your pocket.

"Give me his number, I'll call him on the way. We have a car ready to take us. It'll just be you and me and another police officer.

You looked at her, making sure his contact was opened before handing your phone over, letting her take control.

***

The curtain was pulled back when the examiner came in, the table of instruments ready for the rape kit. The only thing saving your pride was the paper-thin hospital gown, your clothes off somewhere to be examined.

There was bruising on your neck from where the perpetrator had grabbed to keep you from screaming, but you were lucky that those were really the only external injuries.

"Alright love," the nurse smiled slightly. "I have a couple of swabs alright? I'm going to swab your mouth, vaginal area, the insides and backs of your thighs, anywhere that he could have left any DNA in regards to ejaculation, pubic hair or skin oils alright? We're also going to comb through your pubic hair and try to find anything we can to identify your attacker," she explained, grabbing the first que tip. You sat with your feet hanging over the side of the exam table, nodding along.

"Can I have some water?" you asked quietly.

"Once I swab. We don't want anything being washed away."

"He didn't... put it in my mouth though... just his fingers at one point, I don't..."

"There could be something left love. Skin cells, and things like that. Can you open for me?"

You opened your mouth and closed your eyes. You wanted it to all be over. Harry had been asked to bring some clean clothes for you when he got there, whenever that would be. You were really hoping it would be soon. You wanted to leave.

You zoned out when the nurse had to swab and comb between your legs. It felt like she was down there for hours as you just stared at the ceiling. Pictures of the bruising on your neck were taken, and once that was done, so was the exam. They had gotten everything they could for samples so you sat up when everyone had left your small, curtained off space, pulling the thin blanket over your legs. You were so tired.

You could hear chatter on the other side of the curtain that blocked you from the rest of the patients. One voice was unrecognizable, the other was obviously Harry. Finally. When the curtain was pulled back, Harry was the first one through. He looked panicked, worried, upset... relieved. You couldn't really place it. Your mind was too frazzled and caught up in your own situation, you didn't have the energy to worry about him.

"I'm so sorry I took so long... I couldn't go into your apartment so I had to grab something from mine."

"They had to search my apartment..." you started quietly, your throat feeling grateful for the water you were finally allowed to have. "Don't know why... it happened in the hallway..."

"How did no one hear?" he asked, coming to sit by your legs. He pulled a clean pair of panties, a pair of sweats and a t-shirt from his bag. Comfortable and loose clothes.

Shrugging your shoulders, you reached forward to take the clothes from him. You didn't trust yourself to talk and you couldn't bring yourself to look him in the eye.

"(Y/N)?" the nurse popped her head in. "The detective needs to take a statement from you, are you ready?"

"Yeah," you nodded. It hadn't really sunken in yet, what had happened.

"Remember me?" Detective Roland gave you a soft smile as she stepped in, nodding at Harry in greeting.

"Yeah."

"I just need you to tell me what happened again okay? And then I'll need to have a talk with your boyfriend."

"About what?" you furrowed your eyebrows together slightly, shaking your head and finally looking up at him. "He didn't do it."

"We just need to rule him out."

"Hey, it's okay," Harry reassured, grabbing onto your hand gently and massaging him thumb over your knuckles. "Let's just get this over with okay? And then I can take you back to my place if you'd like? Unless you want to go to yours..."

"I want to go to yours..." you spoke, clearing your throat and grabbing your water with your free hand. Turning to look at the detective again, you had to take a deep breath and grip onto Harry's hand. "I was just walking down the hallway, getting home from my afternoon classes..."