"No, you asshole! You're an abusive bastard and I never wanna see your face again!" She shouted at me. I broke down in tears and cried out, "But Feeowhnuh, I nehd yoo ehn my life!" She slammed the door and left, tears streaking down her pale face.
*record scratch* Yup laddeh, that's me. You're probably wondering how I ended up in this situation. I'm not going to explain, because the author doesn't care that much. It's more interesting what happens after.
YOU ARE READING
Shrek: life after the end of love
FanfictionShrek and Fiona didn't work out. They divorced, and she got the kids. Now, Shrek is an alcoholic mess of a man who really needs to get his life together. Spoiler: he won't.
