A Flame from Within

The beginning

I ignite the match and slowly bringing it closer to the cigarette that was dangling from my mouth. I let the match burn all the way to the bottom of the stick before lighting the cigarette, the flame hits the tip and the paper turns to ash. I inhale deeply, allowing the smoke to cloud my lungs and exit as I exhale. I place the cigarette between my fingers and lean back against the wall.

I can hear the shrill school bell ringing in the distance, but don’t make the attempt to move from my place on the red brick wall. The smoke clouds around me and creating a haze. The clouds above seemed to move along with the grey smoke.  

I light another match and just watch the flame. The red and orange blending together; Slowly eating its way down the stick. The flame bites at my fingertips, but I don’t feel anything, The scorching hot flame licks away, flickering around my pale skin, creating a translucent vibe. I drop the match and watching as it falls to the ground. The cigarette dropping ashes to the ground along with the match. I watch as the campus empties of students as they made their way to their morning classes, They move quickly, wanting to get out of the cold.  I decided to skip the rest of my class, Only got through the second hour before I wanted to leave.

I drop the cigarette, smashing the bud with the heel of my boot. I push off from my spot on the wall.  I walk along the sidewalk as I move toward the back gates of the school. Pushing on the rotting metal, it groans loudly, protesting against the weight. I huff as I realize it’s stuck, again. I take a step back, take a deep breath and kick the door. It swings open with a bang that echoes around the empty sidewalk. Shaking out my leg, I walk out, moving toward the parking lot. The staff parking lot is quiet, no one around. Students are not supposed to park in this parking lot since it’s only for staff, But no one ever stopped me, No one ever dares to say anything to me.

Opening the door to my jeep, I jump in and immediately start the heat, the vents blasting and thawing out my cold hands. The cold never really affected me, but I hated cold hands. I try to generate more heat in my hands by rubbing them together, soon my hands and the rest of the car are warm and mobile again.  I put the car into drive, and rip out of the parking lot.

The drive to work is short and sweet, and with my car, it takes no time before I pull into my parking space. I turn the roaring engine off and open the door. My boots thump against the pavement as I get out of my car. The cold winds nip at my face versus the warm heat of my car. The small diner in front of me, with its flickering lights, has been a Second home to me.
After my mother left me with no home the first time, This was my refuge for a while. Its red bricks and peeling posters in all of its glory. I walk up the steps, wet from the previous night’s rain. The tiny bell above the door tinkles, welcoming me back.  The blast of warm air and the smell of coffee washed away any cold that was left on my skin. The quiet chatter and the clattering of dishes, cup, and silverware surround me. I walk back behind the front counter. 2 of our regulars are already sitting there, chatting quietly. I remove my flannel. Grabbing the apron from the hook behind the counter. Tying it around my waist quickly, I grab the pot of freshly brewed coffee and walk up to the regulars, Sam, and Paul.
   “Good morning Gentlemen, Coffee?” I say, smiling as Paul smiles brightly.
   “Yes ma’am” Sam’s southern accent very prominent.
    “How’s your morning Violet?” Paul asks as I fill up their almost empty cups.
I smile lightly and reply as I move on to sam’s cup
   “Just got out of school, came over here cause I just knew you would need more coffee.”
At this, Paul laughs loudly, the smile lines already etched into his old face seem deeper every time he laughs. Shaking his head, still smiling, he grabs sugar and cream off the counter, fixing his coffee. Sam does the same.

“You gentlemen enjoy the coffee,” I reply to them both
“Of course miss Violet,” Sam replies politely

Smiling, I walk back to the counter, placing the pot back in its place.