Thoughts & Feelings

April 25th 2018

"I think it's important to realise you can miss something, but not want it back."
- Unknown

-I don't know where I stand anymore. I think I love him, but I don't feel those butterflies you usually have. Maybe I just miss the feeling? That feeling when you love someone and you'd do anything for them? I keep thinking about him. His blue eyes, kinda girly-ish, but damn they are pretty. I can't. Stop. Thinking. About. Him. But does that even mean anything? Worse part is, I don't even remember if I loved him when we were together. But I know me ending it broke him. I was young and did stupid stuff. It's been two years, and I don't want to "repeat history", as some might say. Or hurt him because I'm not sure of my own feelings. I'm probably just lonely.
-But what if he still loved me like I think I still love him?
-If I'm not sure what's the point?
-I'll just let time do it's thing.
-But I don't have that much left, he'll be gone at the end of the year, so will everyone, heading to sixth-form!

What should I do? What can I do? Somebody help me, just, please, help me...