Until The Time Comes

I stuttered as I attempted to read the eulogy. I looked up, and saw 59 pairs of eyes glaring at me. Only one person did not come to Jason's funeral; his mother.

"Jason was a lovely person to be around while he was on earth..." I started, quietly screwing up the pre-written eulogy.

"Generous and forgiving, he always turned the other cheek, kept his cool." I continued cautiously looking around me for disapproval. A loud sob burst out in one of the pews, but still I carried on.

"I was so lucky to even be in his presence, his warm and kind heart shone out like no other person I've met before, and when he proposed to me, I didn't even hesitate, I knew I was the luckiest woman to be engaged to a man like Jason." I said, my throat closing up as if I had swallowed a snooker ball. 

"I know this should be our wedding day, and it hurts me that he can't be here, but ultimately I know he is in a better place, in the welcoming arms of Jesus and the other saints, and watching over me, making sure I keep pushing myself and never get lazy. I'll grant his wish with all my heart, and once I'm up there with him I can tell him that he was the only thing pushing me forward, and stay with him forever in heaven..." I cried, mopping up the tears from my face.

After the funeral was over, I had to face writing an email to 350 people, telling them the wedding was cancelled, telling the venue to cancel the booking, tell the caterers I no longer needed their service, but worst of all, sleeping in an empty bed. I had no idea what to do with my engagement ring, I know he had spent lots of money on it, but I couldn't face looking at it. I could see the reflection of his face in the diamonds, I couldn't bear it any longer, so I hid it under my bed. I turned on the radio to cheer myself up, but the song that was playing was "Sweet Caroline" the song he serenaded me with before proposing. Jason was a skilled musician, no one could deny that, when he sang, your heart melted, and you couldn't think of anything else but the beauty of his voice. I immediately turned the radio off and got to work on cancelling the wedding.

I couldn't sleep that night, memories of his voice crowded my mind and I couldn't think of anything else. I read for hours on end to distract myself, but he kept creeping back into my mind. But just at 3:33 I felt something warm touch my hand. I jolted around and saw his beaming face.

"What's wrong, sweet Carrie?" He spoke softly, a perfect wrinkle crossing his forehead in concern. I sat there, dumbstruck for a moment. I finally said

"Why did you have to leave, everything was going perfectly until then, nobody told me how it happened!" I said angrily, feeling a pang of guilt afterward.

"Sweetheart, I can't tell you why I am not with you in person anymore, it'll be something you will have to figure out for yourself, but in the meantime there is something I have to give to you before I leave to be in the kingdom of the Lord..." He smiled. He held out his his hand which held a ring he was going to exchange with me today. It looked like two people shaking hands, but once you opened the hands you could see they were both holding a golden heart, and became 3 seperate rings. I started to well up with tears before he finally said,

"Until the time comes my dear," and with that he planted a kiss on my cheek, and disappeared.