The House in the Lake

The House of the God

The first memory I have, of the lake, is from when I was four years old. Funnily enough, there are parts of the incident I remember as if it happened yesterday, while other parts I can't recall at all. And even more so, there are some details I remember, sometimes vividly but, differently each time.

The dreams I see, from time to time, of the very same event may have messed up with my memories of it, too. They are dreams and so, they are inaccurate, of course. At times, even whilst I'm still dreaming, I can say something is off. Most times, though, I realise it only after waking up.

Anyway! Let me tell you what I do remember of the incident.

As I said, I was four, then. I remember my father waking me up too early in the morning and telling me to quietly get ready, for us to go for a walk. I don't remember him giving me any excuse for that, but I do remember I got ready quietly, and sneaked out of the house, with him, without eating any breakfast, or waking up my mother.

It was pouring outside and this, along with the early hour of the day, made it as dark as night. I always find it stupid we did what we did in a weather like that, but at the time I don't recall giving it a second thought. So, anyway, my father grasped my hand, so tightly it actually hurt, and said, "Let's go", looking straight in front of him.

There are other moments from when I can remember the exact phrases I heard or spoke – both on this occasion and on others – but when I remember this particular saying, I can actually hear my father speaking. Mind that my father died a few months after this event, from some illness, so remembering his voice is surprising to me.

So we hit the road and walked a little hurriedly. Well, I was small, so I don't know if we actually did so, but that's how it felt to me. Maybe, my father was walking normally. But it wasn't like he was trying to find cover, or to avoid the rain any how. We just walked down the town, towards the lake.

There was a boat there. I think it was my father's, but I can't really remember the boat. He lifted me and put me in it and then he got in it as well, and we set off. I remember that my father used the oars and started the engine only when we were far away from the coast. Well... what seemed to be far away to me, at least. Probably this I remember inaccurately, for it doesn't make much sense, but that's the image I have in my mind. But then again, many a distance seems much smaller now than it did when I was a kid.

Even when winds hit our land, the lake never has big waves. There is a part of it where there are many reefs – some visible, some not – and the current there is always strong. There, the lake is always choppy. Much more so when there are strong winds and storms. Coincidentally, this area is near where the rock and the house of the God is. I mean, of Lugh. But, of course, I was too young then to have any knowledge of this.

You may think that our little father and son adventure would have been fun. And, maybe, I had thought so, too, at the time. But it wasn't any fun. It's not like we had any amusing conversations, or did anything together. In fact, I was sat in my place, and told not to move, and my father drove the boat. In silence. But still, I was excited about it, and was looking forward to whatever my father had planned.

Whatever it was, though, it never happened, and I was the one who ruined it for him. I don't remember why and how, but I fell off of the boat, and into the lake.

I was too young, ok? So, no, I couldn't really swim at all. And it was choppy. They felt like huge waves to my small body. And I was feeling like the current was drifting me miles away, back and forth, with a tremendous power. I was desperately trying to keep my head above the surface, but I was under it most of the time. I'm not sure if I was screaming for help, whenever I managed to momentarily get my mouth out of the water. Maybe not. Maybe I thought I still shouldn't make a noise. And, maybe, this is the reason my father didn't realise I had fallen into the lake.