"It was stupid of me to actually think I meant something to you."-JG
I didn't want to wake up.
I refused to wake up.
I just wanted to lay here and die.
"Journey... Journey wake up." A voice calls to me.
It sounded familiar. Like a woman's voice.
"M-mom?" I stammer opening my eyes a little.
"Hi hunny... How do you feel?" She coos.
"I-I... I wanna go home." I cry, realizing what happened.
"Okay sweetie. You can go home. But first... You gotta tell me what's wrong?" She asks.
I sob softly. I didn't want to relive that again.
"Jay?"
"I-I love him mom..." Was all I could say before breaking down.
"Awe baby boo... Everything's gonna be okay." She consoles.
"No... It's not. I-I love him... I-I can't love anyone but him." I sob as she holds me close.
"Come on. Let's get you home, okay?" She coos. I nod silently, grabbing my hoodie. She grabs my wrist showing me the bandages.
"D-don't do this again. Talk to me or Tessa or someone before doing this got it?" She was close to tears but managed to prove her point.
"O-okay." I mumble, putting my hoodie over my shoulder.
I walk out of the nurses office, my hood over my head.
"Thank god you're okay." Tessa sobs.
"Y-yeah... I'm alive." I say almost whispering. I look up to see Jason walking my way, and to be honest the butterflies I use to feel were now transformed into acid.
"Jay..."
"Save it Jason..." I stammer.
"Jay I'm sorry. Just let me explain."
"There's nothing to explain Jason. It was stupid of me to think I actually meant something to you." I spat as tears fall down my face.
"B-but you do..." He whimpers.
"Yeah right." I scoff walking past him down the hall.
I didn't care to look back at him. And from the looks on peoples faces as I walked down the hall, I could tell his face was just as broken as my heart.
[A week before Prom]
Jason has been texting me non stop since I left him a broken mess in the hall way.
He wants to talk, but I can't talk to him. I mean what's the point? He doesn't care that I'm practically in love with him.
And what hurts the most is that I let him touch me. I let him kiss me. And it felt so good and so right.
Then two weeks later, he gets a new girlfriend like nothing happened? How stupid of me to even think about giving him my virginity. Thank god I never told him about it.
But now I'm going to prom alone. And I really don't want to go now. But the dress has been made and everything is all set. So I guess I'll have to go.
"Jay... Why don't you come with us?" Tessa asks.
"No. You and Jaden are going together. I don't want to be a third wheel. Okay?"
"But I hate seeing you like this. It's Danny 2.0." She pouts.
"I got through that I'm pretty sure I can get through this." I say grabbing my book bag and heading to my last class.
As I walk into Mr. Beachum's class, I scanned the room for Jason. But he wasn't there. I sighed in relief as I found my seat.
"Mr. McCann. You're on time." Mr. Beachum says.
My heart clenches at the sound of his name. I don't look up, but I knew he was staring at me.
"Well... Everyone get with your assigned partners. Jason you're with Journey-"
After I heard that, my heart dropped into my stomach.
I hear Jason's footsteps coming closer and closer to me.
"Hey..." He rasps.
"H-hi..." I mumble, moving my book bag so he could sit.
"J-Jay..."
"Don't call me that..." I snap.
"Journey I just want to talk to you. Please..."
"There's nothing to talk about."
"Oh really? Then why didn't you tell me you want me to be your first time?"
My eyes widen. "H-how-"
"Does it matter?" He interrupts me.
I bite my lip. how did he know about that?
"Journey talk to me..."
"It doesn't matter if we talk or not Jason... You hurt me. Very badly. And at this point, I don't think I can forgive you. So just drop it, okay?" I sob softly.
"Fine. Be that way. At least I tried." He said.
"Yeah. A little too late." I mumble so he couldn't hear, but from the look on his face, he did.
The rest of the class period was complete silence between Jason and I. And it killed me. Usually he'd be talking to me about all kinda of things. But now... All he does is stare at me with sad broken eyes, waiting for me to say something. And come up empty handed when I don't.
But what does he expect? I trusted him. And he does this... I can't go through another Danny.
My heart can't take it.
(A/n: got myself together to write this chapter. Writing out my feelings is actually working. Thank you guys for reading. More soon:)
