Love will tear us Apart.

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I always wondered how it might feel like to meet someone you've loved for ages, and to have only seen them through pixelated images and wirelessly transmitted audio. there's something so magical about feeling them, touching them, i always wondered if it'd feel like when WALL-E would rest his head against Eve's. that little spark.

Her Smile.

The woman i love lives miles away, in a place that's hot most of the time. she's so... different. she feels joy in the tiniest of things. she'd been patiently waiting for the rains since a month or so ago. she still does. she waited for the mangoes to come. she ate a lot of them and... she sent me pictures of her, after she did. i'd then proceed to see one of the largest smiles i ever have. the smile was unique, almost as if she'd radiate that joy, of ONLY eating mangoes. Each smile of her's was so untainted with any other sentiment but the one that it represents. it's almost like her smiles are a whole 'nother language.

Her Eyes.

Her eyes are another story. her eyes are the tiniest bit green, and grey... in it's deep and beautiful complexity. her eyes hypnotise me to extents that i've never pictured or imagined to have exhibited upon me in my life. her eyes can make me feel the most colourful and unhindered vigour and joy, as if a glimpse into them would be equal to looking into a mirror. only, this mirror only showed me all the good parts of me. all the parts i need to pay attention to when i'm down in the dumps and i feel like garbage. but on the contrary, they can almost... SCOLD me, in their seriousness. when i used to smoke, she'd look at me with such concern that i'd actually feel the guilt wash over me, and induce this nausea towards the nicotine brimming, tar filled cancer sticks i went through so fast and carelessly.

Her Laughter.

Her Laugh is literally the most beautiful thing i've heard. Her laugh is pure happiness. her laugh can brighten my day to the point of...... well, one day, i essentially... gave up. on life, that is. and i was as alone as i'd ever be. she was busy and i couldn't talk, and i was sat on the edge of the roof of my tower. the number 23 on the elevator would always send a sharp shiver down my spine. almost as if the grim reaper's presence has already set upon me. almost as if the black hooded spectral judge was standing over me with his face leaned in to be beside mine, and his icy cold breath would run down my skin, inducing goosebumps and a chill down my spine. it wasn't coincidence that the winds on the roof were unrelenting. they were just as cold as the fear of death that was lingering in my head. but.... as i sat on the edge, with my feet dangling... about to lean forward... i heard her laugh. and i burst out crying. tears of both happiness and sorrow ran down my cheeks. and at that fateful moment, i couldn't do it... i leaned backwards and fell on my back and cried for a good 15 minutes, before drying my whole face up and walking back to my house, and to my room.

Dreams.

With thoughts like these sprinting through my head, only to take brief "pit stops" to let me admire and appreciate them, i had a song on repeat while i sat in on a bench in the arrivals section of Netaji Subhas Chandra Bose Intl. Airport, playing through my bluetooth earphones. I lost count of how many times it faded out and reeled back in, and eventually, each fade out and repetition drove my eyes to close slowly and induced a deep, almost unbreakable sleep.

After what seemed like hours, i woke up, to have another set of thoughts, ready to run around in my ever so busy brain. I had a dream. a beautiful dream... about her. i dreamt that she'd approach me while listening to the same song that i had on repeat. almost as if she'd been in my head all along, omniscient to all the thoughts and emotions that were rushing through me, in anticipation of her arrival.

Reality.

And... as i sat there grinning slowly, while mulling over these sweet thoughts, i felt a pair of fingers hold my earphones and slowly pull them out and gently put them into her's. i saw a girl sitting beside me. a short girl, with long hair and extensions in them. i saw a familiar smile. one that i've seen in A million pictures. i look up to see a pair of piercing grey eyes looking right into mine, and to my surprise, i hear a small giggle come out from those all too familiar lips. a giggle that evolved into a joyous laugh. i saw crimson cheeks and a stray earphone, running over her shoulder and to her hip. so, i decided to do the same thing she did to me, and i put the earphone in my empty ear. to my surprise, a haunting song started playing, in absolute unison and synchronisation to the one playing through my phone. i look down to see her phone's screen light up to a notification. "Mummy : Have you reached safely?" and right above it was the widget for the music player. it read "Love will tear us Apart - Joy Division".

And at that moment, i couldn't help it. almost automatically, like a magnet, my face drifted towards hers, and my hands did the same. My lips locked onto hers softly, as my hand gently ran up her neck, to palm her face softly.

I felt like WALL-E. She felt like Eve.


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⏰ Last updated: Jun 19, 2018 ⏰

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