I don't feel. I mean, I get the concept of emotion to a point, but I don't have the personal experience. I guess that comes with the lack of being human.
I looked down at the dance floor from my cozy booth above them. There was a couple arguing, the smaller man pushing and yelling at a much larger one, whose hands were up defensively. His face was guilty. There was a third man trying to slink away from the conflict, looking embarassed. I tried to guess the situation; was the smaller man overreacting, or was the jealousy justified?
The rest of the dance floor was filled with couples rubbing up against each other like cats wanting affection. Singles at the outskirts of the crowd were gyrating, moving their hips, trying to capture attention.
The whole scene was a giant mating ritual; once the couples were enticed enough, they would escape to a booth, bathroom stall, or just press themselves into a dark corner for six whole minutes of bliss. The amount of disinfectant used in this club was admirable, but it couldn't cover the smell. Sex, sweat, alcohol. Potent.
"Humans..." Theodora mused, looking at the couple groping eachother in the booth behind me. "Wonder how many will get pregnant tonight?"
"I'm betting five," Lillith chimed, eyes wild. She was shaking her foot under the table, excited. These nights were her favorite.
Theodora flicked her index finger at my full glass. "You haven't taken a single sip. Something on your mind?"
I pushed the drink toward her. "Not thirsty. Just overwhelmed."
She nodded solemnly. "There is a crowd tonight..."
"So much talent," Lillith added, grinning. She was staring at the dance floor, mesmerized. "Found one. You two going to be okay without me? Or, maybe you wanna play with me?"
"Pass. Which couple?" I asked.
"Watch and see. Theo?"
Theodora shook her head. Lillith rolled her eyes and slid out of the booth, tugging her dress lower. "See you guys tomorrow?"
"Mmhmm," Theo downed my drink in two swift chugs. "Knock em dead."
"Wear protection," I reminded her.
Lillith winked and disappeared into the shadows. I looked at the dance floor, trying to find her. Lily hunted more actively than either Theo or I; we could sit back and absorb the energy of the couples around us, but she wanted all of the lust focused on her.
The couple she had chosen was gorgeous; the man tall and well-cut, the woman curvaceous and alluring. The woman had her back pressed against his front, both wearing secretive smiles. Lillith was hovering, plotting. She grinned and made her way to the bar, sliding onto a stool.
The woman pouted and said something to the man. He nodded and headed towards the bar.
"She made the girl want drinks?" I suggested to Theodora.
She nodded. "It would appear so."
Once the man caught sight of Lily, the game was on. Lillith was gorgeous in the basic way humans enjoyed. All curves and secret smiles. Her short platinum blonde hair was spiked into a careful disarray around her head. Large dark eyes, plump lips. Her attire was conservative; a turtleneck black dress with long sleeves, black tights, heeled boots. Lily believed that the most attractive thing about a woman was mystery. She liked the chase. In a few moments after they locked eyes, she was already sliding her fingers across his chest, trying to touch the skin by his collarbone.
"Wow. His girl looks pissed," Theodora giggled. "I think they've been dating for a while. Check out her left hand, looks like an engagement ring."
I nodded and watched the woman, who was clenching her hands into fists. Was she heartbroken? Was she relieved? Did she think this would happen all along, someday?
Lillith was already draped around the man when the woman turned to leave. Tears (angry, or sad?) were streaming down her face.
"Remember when she got attacked by a jealous girlfriend? We had to pry her off of Lily," Theo mused.
"She had a knife in her bra, I remember. That woman nearly killed us."
"Mmhmm. I'm feeling full. Are you about ready to go?"
"Nah, I'm going to stay a little bit longer." I smiled at my friend, to show her that I was okay. "Be safe."
Theo held my hands in hers, squeezing it tightly. I felt a touch of emotion slow into me; her concern, her comfort. "Be safe, Dev." She slid out of the booth and walked away, the crowd digesting her.
I sat back and sighed, frowning. Everything was so boring lately. Nothing seemed to amuse me, to hold my attention. I flexed my fingers, imagining the other places I could go. Entire worlds underwater, me wearing an oxygen mask and tasting flavored air, signing to get directions. Worlds in the distant past, or distant future. So many places to visit, and I just hid here, this tiny world with so many warm, happy bodies.
I couldn't hide forever. But I could try.
