50% of Heaven, 50% of Hell

Chapter Ten: Nothingness

Cas' POV:

She's gone, again. I could feel the life leaving her, and even though last time she didn't die, it was just as bad. She's gone and this time there was no chance of me ever getting her back. I caught her as she fell to the floor. If only I could have been this quick when Crowley threw the knife into her. I listen for anything, a heartbeat, something, but I know what's happened. Shes gone. Sam rushes to my side. 

"Is she OK? We need to get her back to Bobby, he can fix her up. Cas? Cas!" I can hear Sam's yells but I can't reply. I cant stay here, Nevaeh's weight lay heavily in my arms and I cant take it any longer. 

I leave, up to heaven. I didn't have destination, but I ended up in what Naomi used to call our, 'pre-heavens'. It was a heaven made for a person who had not yet died, but was destined to go there. 

It looked like it was made for a teenage girl, signed posters of black and white posters littered the walls, the paint was dark red and there was every man made electronic gadget ever made. I don't understand half of them, or the loud noise coming from the speakers. Some people may have classified it was music but it only hurt my ears. 

I noticed a drawing, on the wall, it was two sided wings. One wing was an angel wing, but connected to it was a scaly like, demonic wing. the two never should have been connected. 

"I'm not good Cas. You know who my parents were. I a little bit of everything, so I'm tainted." I breath in the smell of her hair. 

"Nevaeh, you aren't tainted. You're perfect. In every way. Who cares who your parents were?"

"But i think about, doing, bad things Cas. She lifts her head from my chest and looks up at me. "Sometimes, I daydream about going to hell and just helping them." Had any other angel said this to me I would have been repelled and I would strike them down in the spot. But this, this wasn't wrong. I could understand this, understand her. 

I long for the days when I could feel comfortable around people, when I didn't feel awkward and choppy. Nevaeh always did that to me, she made me outgoing, and she brought out my sense of humor. All of that disappeared the day Naomi stripped her of her memories and threw her to earth. Rage filled me and i toppled a book shelf in the pre-heaven I was standing in. 

"Damn you! Damn all of you, you bastards," I remember the only other time I swore like a human. It was the day Nevaeh fell. 

I swipe everything from the dresser and fling it across the room. I yell once, as loud as I can, and every piece of glass shatters everything either explodes or implodes and the room is wrecked. I cant help but want to destroy everything, Like Nevaeh wanted to when she thought I was dead. Naomi's face fills my mind and my rage grows even more. I grit my teeth and fill myself with the power to go visit an old enemy, 

Nevaeh's POV

It was like I was... floating. In nothingness. I could have stayed there, but something kept poking my foot. It was peaceful and quiet, and the longer I floated the more sleepy I became. But something was keeping my awake, a nudge on my foot, and sharp pain in my chest. I didn't have a name, I didn't know what names were. I was nothing, floating in nothing, and surrounded by nothing. No past, no future, no present.

In the nothingness there was no color, at all. No black, no white, no grey, it was just, nothing. But as the seconds, or hours, maybe even years passed by it got lighter and lighter until I recognized a color. White. I felt another sharp pain, and the nothingness rushed away, as if I has been falling for miles and I hit the water finally.

The white turned into stained wall. Not wall, ceiling. I looked down to see Sam, Dean, Bobby and a black man sitting against the corners  of the room. It didn't like like they sat there, it looked like they were blown there. "What the hell." I ask, sitting up. My chest is aching and I look down to see a thick, huge needle with a big empty vial on it. I pull it out. "What was that. What happened?" I remember being stabbed, I remember, passing out? It didn't  feel like passing out though.

"I hate to tell you little lady, but you were dead." The black guy says, climbing to his feet. Bobby and Dean are already standing, leaving Sam as the only one still on the floor.

"Dead? Where's Cas? And where did Crowley go? And what the hell was in that needle?" The questions come tumbling out of my mouth, and I rub my chest, trying to alleviate the pain that whatever it is they injected me with is causing me. Bobby is the only one who seems to think I deserve an explanation. 

"Yes dead, we don't know, probably hell, and we injected you with angel grace and adrenaline. Luckily it seems to have brought you back." He says. I want to lie back down, curl up with the blankets and just pass out and never wake up, but I did the opposite. I swing my legs over the bed and stand up, shakily. I can feel the blood rushing to my limbs, and I stretch experimentally. 

"We need to find Cas and make sure he's not doing something stupid. We also need to find Adam, I have a few questions for him." I pause for a second. "And what the hell ever happened to that shrtiga?"

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Sorry if its a crappy and short update, Ill try to update longer and sooner lol. Yesm Nevaeh was dead, 

Kinda a sneak peak, Cas gets himself in trouble, and the winchesters cant find him, So i will throw in an occasional Cas' POV. Adam is gonna have some drama too. 

and tell me, do you guys want me to focus on the action parts of the story, the drama, romance, just tell me what you guys would rather me lean towards the most lol.