Strange relations

The Job

Ring... Ring.. Ring!!!

"Hello! Welcome to the relationship hotline I'm Stacy how may I help you?"

"Hello! I'm Carla, I like my friend and I don't know if he likes me back. He flirts with me all the time, but I just don't know if I should risk the friendship."

"Well Carla, I think you should go with it. If he's been flirting with you for a long time and you think that he cares about you enough, you should go for it."

"But-But what if it doesn't work out?" I pressed the mute button. Stupid people and their ROMANCE PROBLEMS!!!! I can't wait until I am out of this hotline thing and in the psychiatric ward of the hospital. Click.

"If it doesn't work out then it wasn't meant to be. If he doesn't like you know you know and you can stop wasting your time and eventually move on. If he likes you and accepts you then you live happily ever after. Either way," cue sigh, "you'll know."

"Thank you! I'll try it." I can picture her firmly nodding her head. I hope he's smart and chooses her. If not I'm going to have another job on my hands.

Ring!!!

"Hello! Welcome to the relationship hotline I'm Stacy how may I help you?"

***

"Well Trudy, if you think he's using you for sex then stop having sex with him. Just once, say you couldn't make it and had a death in the family. If he consoles you, he cares. If he doesn't...well you were right and he needs to get a life."

"T-T-T-thank you Stacy." Click.

"Alright people that was the last call of the day. You're free to leave!"

I packed up my stuff and got ready to leave for the day. "Not you Brooks! I need to speak with you in my office." I chorus of OOOOHHHHs' broke out in the room and I trudged my way to the door trying to hide my Cheshire grin. He has something for me from one of his trips...I wonder what it is.

That's Eric, a six foot four tall African American man with the power to make you laugh all the way to your casket. He's the owner of the hotline; started it after his wife died, he wanted to help people make up and break up. Because life is just TOO SHORT. IT surprised me that he was married at first, he was 26 when I met him. I was a freshman in high school and he was my teacher. He helped me understand and ENJOY social studies, and for that I am grateful. He was happy and we were really close, I stayed after school almost everyday with him.

When his wife died; a part of him died too. He started to be more reserved and didn't want to talk a lot in class anymore. He was seldom there after school. But I'm persistent, so I went to his house one day. Caught him with a rope some pen and paper crying on the floor muttering her name. "It hurts so much." He would sob. It killed me to see him like that. So, I helped him. Talked about her with him, made him remember what he still had to do in the world. I also helped him fix some of his friends personal 'problems',

He gave me a job at the hotline and I've been here even since.

"You know, you get more beautiful everyday!" He cooed. Okay... maybe I was wrong, he wants something.

"Cut the crap E, what do you want?" I sighed. Please don't be romance help please don't be romance help please don't be romance help

"Well... I need you to break up with my sons' girlfriend for him." He said guiltily. Well, it isn't romance help. I need to be more vague with my wishes.

"Why do you need ME to do it? Your the parental! All you need to do is say" I forbid it! Get away from my son and never come back!" and be done with it" I said dryly.

"Yeah...there's a problem with that, she's suicidal."

"Then why the heck can't he just break up with her himself, I'm sure if he lets' her down gently she won't kill herself." I reasoned. No suicide missions!

"He can't do that, he's a player."

Just my luck. "Didn't you raise your son to be a better man? I thought that you were going to straighten him out last year."

"I thought I did! I thought he was committed to this girl, he didn't do anything with another girl for a YEAR. But apparently it just took that long to get into her pants. Now, she won't leave him alone."

"Call the cops." I started to walk away hoping to escape before he grabbed my arm and gave my puppy eyes.

"I don't want to get my son involved...please?" No, DAMNIT!

I sighed, "fine, but I get to do it the way that I want to."

"What way is that?"

"Curiosity killed the cat!" He grabbed me around my waist and hugged me from behind. "You know you wanna tell me" He whispered in my ear. "Please?" Damn him and his voice!

"Fine! I'll play break-up artist, happy?!" He turned me around and pecked my nose, "Very." Him and those damn puppy eyes.