Sometimes I feel like the world is turning against me. Just like any other teenage girl I often feel self consious and unloved. I am so blessed to live in a place where I don't have to worry about when my next meal is going to be, or how I am going to pay my next bill. I have every materialistic item I could ever need. It kills me when people say "How could you be unhappy? There are people so much worse off then you!". Everyone is going through their own struggles and you can never fully understand what a person is going through. Money can't buy happiness, and being blessed doesn't automatically make you happy. I've been struggling with depression and anxiety for about two years now, and I can honostly say these have been the worst two years of my life. I wouldn't wish depression on my worst enemy, because no matter what you do you feel like you are mentally in prison. Nobody around me understands what I'm going through unless they are depressed too. People ask me why I can't be happy, and what they don't know is that I spend every minute of the day wishing I was happy. I didn't bring this upon my self, and it wasn't a choice. I am so envious of the happy people I see every day, and I just wonder why I can't be happy. As much as I try, I still spend nights crying myself to sleep, I lay in bed all day trying to control my emotions, and I try to tell people what I am going through but nobody seems to listen. I feel like I am dying inside, and am just a shell of a person.
