snail mail to australia // a.i

chapter four

My heart was ready to burst out of my chest. I felt constricted, needing to find any way to find air. I felt light-headed, my eyes collecting tears and my forehead building a cold sweat. I wobbly speed-walked off of school grounds, desperately trying to calm down.

I hopelessly tried to catch my breath, fully crying by the time I had reached my house. I couldn’t think of a single reason Ali and Nicole would create a rumour about me. We’ve been best friends for almost three years, and we’ve gotten into very minimal fights. They lied right to my face, denying one of my biggest worries. They know that I have anxiety, so why would they even think of a rumour like this?

“Lauren? Hon? It’s time to go to support group.” I faintly heard my mother say from outside my locked bedroom door. I sighed, suck it up, Lauren.

“Okay guys, there are some extra sheets of paper and pencils here if you need some. Get to work on your letters, and then we can have a group circle!” Mr.Patelli noted.

11/13/2014

Dear Ashton,

I sure hope you’re doing well. I’m definitely not. My two best friends (Ali and Nicole) - you remember them right? Just today, two boys I’ve never met, came up to me and accused me of sexting a boy named Luke in the grade above me. I hadn’t ever met Luke, nor sexted him. As I was leaving the school grounds, I overheard from two random students that Ali and Nicole had made up that rumour and spread it throughout their class.

The news shattered me, and as I’m sure you’ve suspected, led to a panic attack. I’m fine now though. I don’t know what to do, Ash. I’m terrified.

I can’t wait to meet you.

Until whenever,

Lauren

I was the first one to complete my letter, and the first one to head to my seat, but that’s not what I wanted. I wanted to be the first one to leave.

The following day, it was time to face my peers at school. The anticipation was bubbling inside me, I couldn’t sleep, and picking up a pot of coffee with shaky hands was not fun.

From the moment the bell rang to the beginning of lunch, eyes never stopped looking at me. At the very beginning of my school year, my English teacher gave us a sheet of paper, requiring us to write our name, our favourite subject, and our goal for the school year. I had written Lauren Yee (of course), Vocal Music, and to not gather any unwanted attention from anyone. Patently, my goal was not achieved, for the day of November 14th, 2014, I had gathered more attention than a celebrity at a red carpet event. However, one particular event that day will remain at the back of my mind forever.

“Hey, Lauren?” I was halfway finished chomping down my sandwich, when a very deep voice startled me. My head whipped up and my eyes met extremely blue ones. He was tall, 6’0 maybe, with broad shoulders, and a dirty blonde quaff. I recognized him nearly four seconds after staring him down. It was Luke Hemmings.

“H-hi. Look, I know you’ve probably heard some bizarre rumours, and I’m sorry, it wasn’t me okay? This is the biggest bullshit and I’m so terrified and-”

“Hey, honestly, don’t worry about it. I’ve heard much worse rumours, and I don’t mind.” He smiled. He smiled. I had expected an angry, hormonal teenage boy to charge at me and yell at me for hearing a rumour like this. I believe he knew I wasn’t going to reply, for he started to talk once again.

“I also told everyone in my grade that it was just a bunch of bullshit, so I wouldn’t worry too much about the rumour spreading any further.” He added. Shooting me another grin, he lightly patted me on the shoulder then proceeded to walk back to his friends.