Possessive || Kim Taehyung

Chapter.1 | Obsession

"WHERE ARE YOU?"
I froze. The outrage, the entitlement, the jurisdiction in his voice frightened me. I needed to leave.
My body lurched into the bathroom before twisting to lock the door behind me. The pounding of his footsteps made me feel so helpless.

"I know you're in there, baby. Open the door."
Silence.
"Baby, please. I'm so sorry I hurt you, but you disobeyed me and broke several of my rules. I told you never to talk with other boys without my permission and you did, even if it was a slip-up." he said with his deep calm voice.

My hands clamped tightly over my quivering mouth.
I couldn't hold it in anymore.
Salty tears rolled down my cheek one by one.
It was more than crying, it was the kind of desolate crying that comes from a person drained of all hope.
I struggled to keep my tears silent.
My knees grew weak and I slumped down on the cold bathroom floor.

"OPEN THE DOOR Y/N!" Taehyung shouted from the other side.
I flinched at hearing his raised voice.

Taehyung faced the door, his face creased and his fists closed so tight he could feel the sweat trapped inside them. That's when he heared a sound that almost stopped his heart. He could hear a sobbing sound from inside the bathroom. Is she crying? He thought.

"OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR Y/N!" He shouted again and punched his fist on the door several times.

I was scared of the Taehyung that was outside the door right now.
I sobbed into my hands and the tears dripped between my fingers.

I looked over at the door. Should I open it?

Fuck it. I was tired of broken promises, I was tired of thinking that maybe Taehyung would change.

"GO AWAY! I AM NOT COMING OUT!" I shouted at him and my voice cracked.

I covered my ears trying to block all the negative things my mind was telling me to do.
My hands trembled as I wiped my tears away.
I buried my head in my arms.

Suddenly, it became quiet. No other sound could be heard other than my heavy breathing. Has he left?
A part of me was relieved that he wasn't here anymore, the other part of me was sad that he left.

It was like I was put under a spell by Taehyung.
I hate this relationship but at the same time without Taehyung I am missing a big piece of my heart.

Our relationship is destroying both of us. Taehyung is constantly worried that I will find someone better than him. He is afraid I will fall for other guys. Why would I do that if I already have a perfect boyfriend?
I feel like a bird stuck in a cage, but the doors are open so why am I not able to escape?
It's been years since I've hung out with my friends. He always control where I go and why I go.
I can't even wear what I want. Taehyung need to approve my outfit first...

But despite all those things I still love him. I know that he loves me with all his heart. I am always the center of his world. No one has ever cared for me the way he does. He is always there when I need him.
We're always happy together when we're alone, but when people are involved, things tends to get out of hand.

I feel like the distance between us pulls my soul out of my ribs rendering me breathless, sinks me into the subconscious.
His laughs are the secret behind my eternity of happiness.
If he goes away, all of this will be hindered and I'll be nothing but a lifeless body.

This relationship is like a drug.
I regret loving him, but if I had the chance to go back in time I would still fall in love with him all over again.
That's how powerful he is.

****

Several hours had passed and my stomach snarled and howled and from it came the not-so-subtle undertone of pain.
It came in waves and it seemed as though my stomach was slowly digesting itself.

I decided to come out of the bathroom. Taehyung had probably also left.
I stood up and my head started slightly spinning.
I could feel a sharp pain in the back of my head.
I hesitantly opened the door and my eyes widened at the sight of Taehyung sitting down right in front of the door.

Color drained from his face, as white as a slice of bread, white as a ghost, white as a sheet.
Has he been here the whole time?

Taehyung slowly lifted his head up and immediately stood up when he realized that I had gotten out.
I felt my heart beating faster and sweat form in my palms.

He stood in front of me for a moment before he pulled me in a hug.

He buried his head in my shoulders.
"Why do you always do this?" he whispered in my ears causing goosebumps to appear on my arms.
I couldn't think straight as I just stood there like a stick.

Taehyung took a step back and furrowed his eyebrows.
"Why are you not hugging me back?"
He looked at me and asked.
His stare gave me shivers.

"Let's end this, Taehyung" I said not trying to break down.

Taehyung looked at me with a blank expression.
"What?" He murmured.

He held my shoulders and stared intensely at me as if he was trying to hypnotize me or something.
His eyes were red and teary.
"Don't say that Y/N, I promise to treat you better this time, I swear." His voice was shaking.

I am so used to hearing this sentence.

I rolled my eyes and chuckled.
"That's what you say every time" I said through gritted teeth.
I could feel tears form in my eyes again.
I didn't want to cry.
I didn't want him to think that I still wanted him.

Taehyung caressed my cheek with his thumb. He was slowly making me change my mind again.
But I was determined to end this today!

"I really mean it this time, Y/N. Give me just one last chance" He begged and kissed both of my hands.

I pulled my hands away leaving him speechless.

"What about the last promise you made Taehyung? And what about all the other promises you made?" I asked as tears rolled down my cheek.

"Y/N, this time it's different!" He said.
I could tell that he was trying really hard not to lose control.
His hands were formed into a fist and he couldn't even hold eye contact with me.

I sighed. My mouth was dryer than a sandbox in summer.
The silence was making me go crazy.
I just wanted to scream all my feeling out.

"Taehyung, don't you understand that this relationship is destroying both of us!" I said exhausted. Why doesn't he understand?

Taehyung brushed his fingers frustrated through his soft brown hair. He clenched his jaw and his eyes didn't have the sweet look in them anymore.

"I'm telling you this for the last time now, Y/N. I will treat you better. I will protect you. So please just-"
"NO TAEHYUNG, STOP IT! LET'S NEVER SEE EACH OTHER AGAIN!" I cut him off and shouted at his face.

I wasn't sure if Taehyung was laughing or crying at this point.

"WOW Y/N. I KNEW YOU NEVER LOVED ME!" He said and turned around as he breathed heavily.

DOES HE EVEN THINK BEFORE HE SPEAKS?!
HOW CAN HE EVEN SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT?!

"WHAT THE FUCK MAKES YOU THINK THAT? YOU'RE THE ONE WHO DOESN'T LOVE ME, YOU ASSHOLE!!!" I snapped and accidentally spurted out what was on my mind. My eyes widened and I bit my tongue.
I had never in my whole life sworn at him...

He looked really furious.
Taehyung raised his hands and before I knew it I felt a burning pain on my right cheek.
He just slapped me...
I fell with the force of it. I hadn't expected him to be so strong but there was weight and strength enough to stun.
I gasped as I held my cheek and lifted my head up as I looked at him in disgust.

Taehyung's eyes widened and he looked shocked as well.
"I didn't mean to- I'm really sorry" He said as he he came forward to hug me.

I pushed him away as I groaned.
Saying sorry doesn't fix the heartbreak he have caused and the added fear. Sorry is just a word.

I turned around and ran out of 'our' apartment.