Coming Out #Wattpride

Amy (1 of 2)

Right now, I'm on my way to meet my best friend Louis in a café. He's the nicest guy I know but I'm still starting to feel nervous. The reason for this is my fear of his reaction after I will have told him everything. I already know that he's tolerant however you don't know how the people react if its in their near environment.
While I was deep in thought I already reached the café and now I was standing before the door until I found the courage to open it and enter. I don't need to search for Louis because this is our usual meeting spot and we always sit on the same table. So, I walk to our table and see Louis waving at me. Before I can sit down he stands up and hugs me. I think this is a bad habit from him always hugging other people but I don't mind it. "Hey Amy. Nice to see you again", he says and I answer "Yeah, its been a long time."
We don't see each other often because we don't go to the same school and Louis home is like on the other side of the city. Usually we meet here on the weekends or I stay over at his place however sometimes we meet in the week. Most times when this happens we have something urgent to tell the other which cant wait until our next meeting.

After the hug we sit down, wave the waiter and order 2 hot chocolates like always. We will wait until the cups arrive before the serious talking begins. While waiting we talk about unimportant stuff. I think we started this after some of these meetings then it makes you relax a little bit. Seriously it works quite well.
"So how was your day?" Louis suddenly asks after some time of silence. "Don't talk so suddenly, you startled me. To answer your question, it was good until we had biology. I don't understand this subject, its horrible. Furthermore, the teacher wanted to know something from me while I didn't even listen. So, I was totally screwed and the idiots from our class started laughing like they would know it." I tell him. Then I see him chuckle and say bothered "Hey stop chuckling. That's not even funny." He looks me in the eyes and answers in a serious voice "Of course it's not funny but the way you underline your words with facial expression and gestures is." Speechless I gaze at him till we both start laughing at the same time. >Wow, he really knows how to make me feel comfortable< Then we hear a noise and look up to see the waiter standing at our table with 2 hot chocolates. He puts them on the table and goes. We both take the cup in our hands and drink a sip. After this the serious talk will start.

I'm getting nervous once again because now there's no way out. Louis notices it, grabs my hands and says "Whatever you will tell me, I will listen carefully, wont interrupt you and stay your friend." I take a deep breath and start talking "Its difficult to tell you even if I know, all that you said is true. About 2 months ago a new girl came to our class. Her names Vivian and she's the same age as me. Vivian seemed interesting so I started talking to her and offered to show her the school. After some talking we understood each other very well. We share the same interests and she even likes Zelda and Persona. That's also the reason I invited her over for the first time. At my home the only thing we were doing was talking and it didn't get boring after hours. Normally this is the case while we are together but with someone other then you it was never so. It surprised me and I almost forgot my training. When I told her that she had to leave, she seemed so sad that it made me feel bad. I went to the hall after I had sent her off.
After I got back home, my mom had made dinner like always and told me that the next time I bring a friend over I should invite them to eat with us. I asked how she knew that someone was here and she answered that there was a note left at the table. Then I questioned myself how I couldn't notice it.

You know what Vivian wrote? Thanks for helping me today. I really enjoyed my time with you however we shouldn't deepen our relationship any further otherwise rumours will start spreading about you soon. Bye Vivian.

I was standing totally shocked in the kitchen like I just froze. Till I awoke from that state 5 minutes had passed and my mum was looking worried at me. I smiled at her and said that I was really hungry so we should hurry up and start eating. My mum nodded and put the dishes on the table. We sat down and started eating. During the meal we didn't talk, not that it was bothering me instead I was glad because I didn't even want to. As soon as I finished, I ran up to my room, opened the door, closed it behind me and threw myself on my bed.
There I thought about the note from Vivian. I couldn't understand what she meant with that and racked my brain over this matter. In the end I decided to speak to her at school the next day. With that I fell asleep." I take a little time from talking while I drink my hot chocolate until I continued. "When I woke up the next day I was tired like I never even closed my eyes. I also had no appetite which was really strange because normally I eat a lot. After I left the house I was getting more and more nervous on my way to school until it was almost unbearable. Finally, I arrived and luckily, I saw Vivian walking into the school. Loud I screamed her name while I ran up to her. However, she went in like she didn't hear me. I was shocked but I had come to the decision that she had to tell me what the note meant.
After school I grabbed her arm before she could go out of the classroom. She didn't seem happy about it but I wasn't letting her go until she explained everything to me properly. So, I asked "Could you come home with me today too or go to a café to talk?" She nodded silently and let herself be dragged along by me.

At home I made 2 hot chocolates and sat down at the dining table. Vivian was still standing at the door and glance nervously at me. I waved at her and she actually came and sat down. There was silence until I broke it and asked "What does the note mean? What do you mean with rumours will start?" She looked at the table while I stared at her desperately waiting for an answer. Before she started talking some minutes had passed. "Uhm, its not that easy to talk about, you know? Even so you could just wait and see the rumours spreading. So why bothering asking me?" "Hm, I would like us to be friends cause you like lots of things I like too. Furthermore, I don't really care about rumours, that's all." I said. Vivian smiled a little for the blink of an eye but I saw it and it made me happy. "Thanks for that" she replied and then continued "Ok I will tell you however if you betray my trust I wont talk to you anymore. Is that clear?" I answered immediately "Yes, sir." There was another little smile which made me strangely feel warm inside. "I like girls." She whispered suddenly and lowered her head. I stared at her but I couldn't identify the feelings inside me - maybe shock but also happiness? After some minutes I found my voice and spoke "It doesn't bother me. Its something very normal and I can't understand the people that are bothered by something like this. It doesn't change the character of the people but it seems not everyone is able to understand that. If that's clear then, lets be friends." Now she stared at me with surprise written al over her face. Then she started smiling and said happily "Yeah, lets be friends."