Being a hero definitely is easier

It was really late when you came home that night. The neighbourhood was completely silent, the only perceptible sounds being the ones your feet made when they met the cold bitumen. Tiny puffs of hot air flew away from your mouth each time you breathed, and you nuzzled your frozen nose deeper in your large scarf, shivering a bit.

It's been forever since you could spend a day outside your house, busy as you were with two kids in early infancy who wouldn't even let you pee in peace.
You finally had the opportunity when your co-workers told you that your heroes' agency was having its annual dinner paid by the boss, and that it would be great to see you again.
You hesitated first. It wasn't like you were being an active hero since you were still in parental leave, so you felt a bit like a freeloader to join them, but they had been very persistent. Truth to be told, it felt like the last time you could enjoy an adult discussion was during your previous life. Even when your friends dropped by to see you at home, the meeting was always short-circuited by two spiky-haired tornados requesting your complete attention.

Actually, it was Katsuki who convinced you to go. He knew it's been a while since you had time alone for yourself, and probably felt a bit guilty for not being as present as he wished to help you raising the troublemakers he made you. So when you told him about the dinner, he took the day off right away to look after the boys for you. If you were originally planning on being absent for the sole evening, your husband managed to talk you into taking the whole day outside the house. He could be great when he wanted to.

You finally arrived to your house, slightly surprised to see that some lights were still on. It was past midnight, you didn't think someone would still be up this late. It better not be the kids. Unlocking your front door, you took your boots, cloak and scarf off, leaving everything in the doorway before heading to the kitchen, the room you saw lit from the outside. What you saw was beyond your expectations.

Katsuki was here, sitting on a chair, body completely limp, arms dangling in the void, his face resting on the table where today's groceries had been abandoned. You couldn't see his expression, and you thought for a second that he was asleep before he turned his head to see you. You repressed a laugh. God, he looked perfectly exhausted.

« You do this everyday ? » he murmured, eyes wide opened in horror.

« Everyday, » you confirmed.

You actually felt a bit proud to see how he acknowledged the toughness of your job. But boy, he really looked like if he just came back from war.

« What the hell have I done to you, » he mumbled as if he realised he inadvertently killed you or something.

« Kids, » you answered with a grin. « Hyperactive ones. »

« They never run out of energy, do they ? »

« Never. I don't know how they do that either. But I bet they've been even more extra today, they must have been so happy to spend the day alone with Daddy... doesn't happen that often. »

« They went Plus Ultra on Daddy, if you ask me... God. I feel dead. I've known busy days where I arrested sixteen fuckers and went to bed less tired than that. »

« I know the feeling, » you laughed and patted his shoulder. « So... What's all this on the table ? You've been staring at that carrot for how many hours now ? »

« I dunno, three, maybe four... I'm pretty sure I can draw it from memory now... See, since the little goblins have been asking me if we could eat pizzas tonight from the very second they woke up, I followed my haunch and made them pizzas. Coz I'm a risk taker. »

« I can see that, » you smiled. « And ? »

« And they ate it all, and they liked it, and then they wanted to play a little longer and then it was bath time and then it was story time and is there really a kid on this goddamn planet who actually falls asleep at the first story ? Coz ours were just as pumped up after the sixth one. I had to kill everybody in a rush at the third page so I could just... escape. »

« No kid settle after one story, we've been bullshitted the whole time, » you shook your head.

« Fucking knew it. Anyway, once they finally chilled out a little, at least enough to get that no, playing Mario Kart on your DS doesn't count as sleeping, even if you're in the dark in your bed, I decided to clean the kitchen before passing out on the couch. And that's when I made the biggest mistake of my whole fucking life... »

« You sat down, » you deduced in deep voice.

« And never found the strength to move again, » Katsuki confirmed. « I haven't even done a single shit around the house like put a load on or something... »

« Don't worry about it, Katsuki. I'm sure the kids were happy to spend the day with you and that you did great. »

Standing behind him, you started to massage his shoulders, earning a deep sigh from his lips. You smiled, fingers prodding his exposed flesh in the gentlest way.

« My poor husband, » you laughed in compassion, arms coming around his torso as you nuzzled in his neck. « It's hard to be a housewife, huh ? »

« Fuck yes. Can't wait to be back at work tomorrow, it's fucking holidays compared to these two. »

« Tell me about it, I can't wait to get back to work either... » you sighed. « Want a cup of tea ? »

« Yeah... »

He felt you nodding in the crook of his neck and kissing his cheek before heading toward the cupboard. He watched you from the corner of his eye, ash-blond strands sometimes hiding his view. He expected the day to be tiring, but not that much. It was true that you looked exhausted when he came home most of the time, but you didn't look like a living corpse like him. To think that all your days were like this... He felt like he could sleep for the whole next week, so how you managed to wake up the next morning was beyond him right now.

« You're going to be the fucking Terminator once you get back in action, » he said as you poured the hot water in his cup. « I think you're getting a harder training than the Marines. »

« Sometimes I thought so too. The days where I actually manage to put them to bed for the nap and they do actually sleep I feel like I just won over the universe. Like, if someone broke into the house with a gun screaming to me to hand over my money and jewelleries, I would just look at them right in the eyes and go 'Ha ? You think you can take on ME ? Bitch please, I just put my kids to bed and it only took me forty-five minutes'. »

« Fuck, I got you. »

Katsuki groaned loudly as he used his remaining strengths to lift his upper body from the table, sitting more properly as his hands curled around his cup.

« Hey, I didn't even ask, how was your brats-free day ? »

« Magical, » you answered, wiping a fake tear from the corner of your eye. « For once I could go window shopping without the fear of having one of them throwing a tantrum. There was another mom whose kid was rolling on the floor for whatever reason and she looked just so... done with everything. All the others customers were looking at her and making nasty comments like 'Well that wouldn't happen if she raised him right' and I was like 'Shut the fuck up you know nothing'. She heard it all and looked at me and asked right away 'How many ?' and I answered 'Two. You ?', and she made a face and answered 'Four', and we gave each other the 'Hang in here' mom's look and shook hands and the best part was that the other customers had no idea what we just talked about. »

« Tch... Childless people making comments about education, what the fuck ? Just shut your goddamn mouth, you literally have no clue what you're talking about. »

« Yeah... But well, that was nice having the day for myself. I'm glad I could see my co-workers again, even if some spent the dinner asking me mom stuff or making me talk about the kids. I mean, I love them, you know ? They're my kids, my bones and flesh, I'd do anything for their safety and happiness but sometimes I'm just... tired of moms' speech. I ended up trapped between two others moms at my table and like, can we stop talking about diapers and bottles ? Even just for one minute ? Remember that we moms do exist as persons with hobbies and opinions too ? Please ? »

« Damn, I don't get parents who never stop... parenting. Even when there are no kids around, » Katsuki frowned, emptying his cup.

« That's not the best. One of them had the nerves to ask me if we think we'll be empty-nesters. »

« The fuck is that ? »

« People who get really sad when their kids leave the house. »

There was a silence. A short one where the two of you just look at the other's eyes before bursting into laughter. Katsuki's laugh soon turned into a yawn though.

« Aw, let's go to bed, » you said. « And don't worry, tomorrow I'm back being the housewife and you're free to go ! »

« Well, that's maybe for the best. If I hear one more time the 'Daaaaaad, Mom doesn't do it this waaaay', I'm going to blow a fuse and maybe kill myself. Plus, I tried to go easy on the curses today with these two fucking parrots around, and lemme tell you it's nerve-wracking when you find one colouring himself with felt pen to match the wall so he can become invisible. »

« Oh my... No way, » you muffled your laugh behind your hand. You could only imagine how hard it's been for Katsuki to not swear once he found out.

« And it was after the bath. Obviously. Because it's no fun if Dad can fix your shit right away. I was about to yell when I had this flash of a newspaper saying 'Angry father tells his four-years old to go fuck himself, kiddo later asks mom what it means. Shit ensues'. »

You stifled your giggles the best you could in your sleeve, Katsuki's hand coming to smack your ass as you both headed to the bedroom.