Sam’s POV
-One month later-
I have been diagnosed with Pancreatic Cancer. What did you miss the past month? Nothing. Honestly nothing. My life has been here in this hospital bed. The boys left for their tour. I am alone. Yeah I have Brie and my parents, but it’s not the same. I miss Michael. We skype all the time, but I just want I presence. Life really sucks. I sit in bed all day. The only time I move is when I have to go pee. They removed the tumor and now they are treating me with chemo. It’s the worst thing ever. I throw up all the time, I have lost so much weight, and worst of all I don’t have any hair. None. Nada. Zip. Zilch. Gone. All of it. My only pride; gone.
Right now I was sitting with my lap top waiting for Mikey to call. Instantly his name popped up. I clicked answer and his smiling face showed up.
“Hello my gorgeous girl.” I smiled
“Hey Mikey.” Calum and Luke were yelling in the back. I cocked my eyebrow and he just shrugged.
“I miss you.” He looked at me, a tear fell down my cheek.
“I miss you too.” My voice cracked. He frowned.
“Don’t cry baby, we will be back shortly.” I knew he was only saying that because he wanted me to feel better but he still had another month of touring. I sighed and nodded.
“I just want to feel your touch.” He smiled.
“I wish I was there baby. I love you so, so, so much.” I smiled.
“I love you so, so, so much more.” He smirked and blew a kiss.
“I’ll call you later, I got to go.” And hung up. I sighed and put the computer to the side. This is my life now. My parents think its weird cause all of sudden I’m ‘depressed’. I’m not though. I just can’t do anything. Like the wisest man once said “Depression is not a side effect of cancer. Depression is a side effect of dying.” Yes Mr. John Green. The best author ever. As I quote again, “John Green was the only person I’d ever come across who seemed to (a) understand what it’s like to be dying, and (b) not have died”. And being as when I read the book when I was as healthy as a horse, it didn’t seem to make sense to me. Now that I am actually witnessing death myself, it became clearer.
I looked out the window. Sunsets. I loved them. They showed the true beauty of the world and it made me happy inside. Though this time, it only hurt. It hurt because it seems that this is the last one I’ll ever see. The saying ‘Live like there’s no tomorrow’ is true. You never know when you will die, so live your life to the absolute fullest, and don’t give any fucks! I just wish I would’ve had a warning to all of this. I haven’t owned up to that quote and it kills me because soon I won’t wake up. I truly am a pathetic excuse for a human being. It makes me wonder why I’m not dead yet.
I sighed once again. Sighing is like this language I speak now because it is all I do. Everything I do has a sigh after it. I laid back in my bed and closed my eyes. Can I leave already? They told me I had to do a month of chemo and if I was good by then they would release. It’s been a month and I’m still here. Like c’mon! Let me leave!! I sighed again closing my eyes to get some sleep.
-Few hours later-
“Shut up idiot, she’s asleep.” I was hearing voices here and there. I didn’t move so I could see if I could make out the voices.
“Sorry, I just can’t wait till she wakes!” wait a second… those accents were so familiar. I peeked through my eyes and quickly shut them again. It was them! I started yawning, pretending like a just woke up and didn’t know they were there. They all stopped talking when they heard me. I opened my eyes and smiled.
“Michael.”
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A/N
I know it's short! But guyssss!! 500 reads! That's so crazy! I just want to thank you guys for reading! I really hope you enjoy it (:
