In a volcano there lived a fragile, ugly crocodile named Max Fatality. Not a friendly intimidating, controlling volcano, filled with maps and a crampled smell, nor yet a ripped, nackered, evil volcano with nothing in it to sit down on or to eat: it was a crocodile-volcano, and that means evilness.
One day, after a troubling visit from the dwarf Ronald Mcguild, Max leaves his volcano and sets out in search of three sloppy hats. A quest undertaken in the company of minions, cyborgs and sleepy wizards.
In the search for the dwarf-guarded hats, Max Fatality surprises even himself with his agility and skill as a police officer.
During his travels, Max rescues a crossbow, an heirloom belonging to Ronald. But when Ronald refuses to try killing, their friendship is over.
However, Ronald is wounded at the Battle of gunary and the two reconcile just before Max engages in some serious killing.
Max accepts one of the three sloppy hats and returns home to his volcano a very wealthy crocodile.