Finding Herself

Apologize

Hear the song Next to me by Alex Johansson🎶
Swear to god this song has hell a lyric which makes a lot of sense💢
There is always a time for me when I will go to the lighthouse in between school when I feel tired so right now I was sitting on the Arm chair near the lake don't judge me but I have a habit of talking to myself so I was siting and murmuring "everyone loves bullying me and I don't get it like kissing a boy is that big deal like dating more than one guy is such a big deal like come on bro there are hell of sluts but I am not I still have my v card with me"

Suddenly I heard some chuckle I looked back and found  no one and I know it's just my imagination and I started mumbling about how bad James was and I had to do the entire assignment with him

I looked at my phone and saw that the bell will be ringing soon

So I drove back to school and parked my car

Soon after the bell rang I planned to go to library cos our English teacher was not present so I took an excuse and thought of working on the physics assignment that I have with that James🙄

Unknown:hey u free?
Me:Who is it!!
Unknown:oh my god forgot me?
Me:pls I don't have time just spit it
Unknown:ok it's me James
I rolled my eyes I don't understand why the hell did he text me now
Me:ohhk wht u want😑
BUllYJ:well thought of working on our assignment 🤓
Me:well I am on my way to the school library join me dr we will work over dr
BUllYJ:dr in 10🙃
Me:no bullying or talking abt my past
BUllYJ:I will think abt it😏
Me:jerk
BUllYJ:I m coming 😆😎

I closed my phone and I regret him being my partner I walked to the library and saw our librarian hearing songs he had his ear phones plugged in his ear so I walked and took a seat near the science refer section and saw that James entering with a smirk plastered on his face "hai sweetheart" I looked up "please stop calling me sweetheart" I said quoting sweetheart with air inverted commas "ok pumpkin" and I frowned hearing him giving me pet names

"Well lets get started pumpkin"he said and I opened my book and started "so we can divide into half and we will work on it together" I said

then he said"great well we can do it in my house so come over after school"

I don't think going with him in his house is not a great idea so I said "no no come over to my house you know I can't drive to your house like please" he said "ok no problem you just text me your address okay" I sighed and nodded my head

and I was wondering why in the world didn't he bully me and I was cut in my daydreaming when he said "ahmm Tay listen I am sorry for bullying you okay I didn't knew that all those were funky rumors that people spreaded I am sorry I know you cried today one of my friend said me about you know I am sorry" and I was sitting with my mouth wide opened James and apologize I couldn't believe 

"Ohh that's sweet of you James I forgive you"
"Well I never knew that those boys you dated were this bad it's only today I came to know how badly you was tortured by Jake I am so sorry you had to go through them" I felt so good but how did he come to know that I was tortured no one in the school knows about it it's only me shan and raf so I asked him
"James mind saying me something?" I asked he said no so I continued "who told you that I was tortured by jake?" His face changed "well you know it's one of my friend and that friend really admire you so much" I felt myself getting excited "what's the persons name?"

I don't know why but I really wanted to know that person who said about my past to him

he replied me with a weird expression "well pumpkin I can't say the persons name but the person really admires you a lot I mean tha..that person knows your past quite well but I am sorry I can't give you any info on that person" he shrugged

"please I promise I won't take that persons name ever again in my life after you say me" but James gave me a evil smile and said "nah pumpkin I can't find it by yourself" and he left with a smirk on his face again I don't understand why he have to smirk all the time

When he was about to go out of the library he turned back and said "pumpkin we are friends right" and I nodded with a smile but who was that person he was talking about was that a boy I thought  to myself..
Idiot which boy will love you now
Look at you no one loves you
Stop okay!!
I don't know but my mind always keep talking and the bell rang and I walked up to my next class.I was excited to say shan and raf about the whole sorry thing with me and James.
After the school I saw them waiting for me

I made over to them and said "guys u wanna hear what happened between me and James?"
And Shans face changed "did he bully you again that motherf..."I stopped shan "no he apologized to me"and I said the whole story to them "that's very strange Tay" raf said "and who is that person who know about the whole betrayed and tortured thing rather than us?" Shan said and I shrugged.

Right after I dropped shan and raf I went home and took a long shower and did all my stuffs  and texted James
Me:hey James
BUllyJ:hey address
Me:Hadley street swift mansion8
BUllyJ:right ther
I sent him my address and changed to some comfortable hoodie and sweatpants and I heard the door bell ring by the time I reached Roni had opened the door.

"Hey pumpkin" James said with a pleasant smile "hey come in" Roni seemed confused cos I never used to bring boys in my house I used to bring only Eric who now moved to London he was my best friend since 5th grade
"Roni this is my friend James he is here to work with the assignment that we are doing together" "oh that's fine you want something to eat or drink miss?" Before I could answer James answered "oh yes I need something to drink I swear I am very thirsty". His face was priceless like really he was saying with that
I need it please expression I chuckled at his reaction and took him upstairs "so you are rich isn't?" "No I am not rich but my parents are!"

The day went along with me and him talking about our hobby favorite and stuffs and that's when it hit me that person who said him about my past "hey James was that a boy or girl who said about my past?" Oh god I shouldn't have asked that god that was the dumbest thing ever asked and he looked to my face with a smile playing on his face "well that will be the only question I will be answering you and the person is a boy" and I don't know why but my heart was beating and I could see myself being happy and I thought to myself he was someone I never knew and before I could even see his face I was getting heartbeats...
After that he went on talking about how sorry he felt for bullying me and all those pardon...

Hey guys that's it so what do you think oh my I don't know but 38 views even though it's less but for me it's like getting 38k views thank you you guys pls keep supporting me😃
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