The Beauty Of Words

Fear of Love

Wanna hear something stupid? I have Philophobia. The fear of being or falling in love.

Love is a amazing thing but i fear it. 

The close bond two people share, the cuddles, the kisses and the feeling of being safe with someone else. It scares me. How would you deal with it if that person isn't there anymore? If they left you because you simply isn't interesting anymore or they found someone else. What about family? The love shared in families are easily broken if someone says something or if a person die and their partner starts changing into someone who they aren't. I'm a really emotional person and that's why i refuse to love anyone, my family, friends, a lover. 

What is my reason for being like this? Thantophobia. The fear of losing someone you love. Last time i loved someone my older sister died in a accident and i broke down. I stopped eating, sleeping and didn't talk to anyone. I ended up in the hospital where they had to force feed me and in the end they put me on medicine for depression and i cut my ties with my family in fear of losing someone else and i stopped getting close to people in fear of ending up loving them.

My Thantophobia led me to getting Philophobia.