Love You Goodbye-Book 4 In the Sexy As Series

Chapter 30

 Louis headed back to his flat. Being with the twins and Karim was like a double edged sword. He loved them so much and he was so happy to be a part of their lives. They brought so much joy to his despite his continued depression.

He took a hot shower and grabbed another beer and then sat down to reread Marian's letter.

His heart hurt. He was in pain. But he knew she was better off with Harry and their daughter. Harry would always be there to pick up the pieces.

He went to bed but he tossed and turned all night. When he did wake up it was close to noon the next day.

He got dressed and got into his car and just drove. He didn't have a destination in mind and then realized he had stopped in front of what was their house once upon a time. It was technically still his house. His mum had given him the keys shortly after he got back to the UK.  He got out of the car and walked up to the door and let himself in.

Furniture was covered with sheets. Walls bare of pictures. He wandered down the hallway to what was their bedroom. The bed was made, but not covered. He sat down and let his fingers run over the nightstand. Covered with dust. He got up and was going to leave but he turned back to a closed door. He remembered what he had done in that room after William died. He reached with a shaking hand and turned the knob.

There was nothing left in the nursery. It had been cleaned up. Every bit of destruction was gone. He opened the closet doors. Half expecting all of Will's clothes to be there. But that too was devoid of everything. He turned to leave but something on the closet shelf caught his eye. He reached up and saw that it was a stuffed monkey. He leaned against the wall and slid to the floor. Clutching the stuffed animal and he let his tears flow freely. "Oh Will. I'm so sorry," he said out loud.

After a few minutes, he pulled out his phone and looked through his pictures and then before he chickened out, he needed to hear her voice. He hit send.

"Hello?" Marian said as she tried to balance her juice and Faith in her arms. She was walking from the kitchen to the living room and hadn't even noticed who was calling.

"Hey, Marian...it's...it's Lou."

 "Louis," Marian said needing to catch her breath. She practically dropped her cup and her daughter.  She quickly set her cup down and put Faith in her bouncer seat before taking a deep breath, calming her self.  "Hi, how are you?"

 He closed his eyes at hearing her voice. This was the first time he'd talked to her since she was in the hospital.  "I'm...I'm okay," he said trying to maintain his composure. "Zayn told me that you had a scare after you got home from the hospital and I...I just wanted to see if you were alright."

 "I'm on oxygen now and I have this small portable oxygen tank attached to my hip at all times." She said savoring his voice. She missed him still.  "Helps me breathe easier."

 He let out the breath he himself seemed to be holding in. "That's..that's great," he said. "I'm ...listen I didn't mean to disturb you. I'm sure you're busy," he rambled on.

 "Where are you?" She asked hesitantly.  "I'm never too busy, you should know this."

He glanced around the nursery. "I'm...um...I was just out driving around. Day off today and I'm...." he kept stammering.

 "Louis....." Marian said knowing he was lying.  She picked up her iPad and sent a message to her mother.   *I need you.  I'm in the living room.*

 Rosalie heard her phone chime and saw her daughters message and she rushed over the less than 200 feet between them and hurried inside. She saw Marian on the phone. "Are you alright?"