Painting Life

N i n e t e e n

A/N: I want to tell all you readers how happy I am with your votes and comments. Eight votes in a single day is a huge progress for me. Thank you, lovelies :) Keep it up! xD

I hope you like this chapter as well even though I personally think it sucks. First draft and all. 

Anyways, Cheers! Happy Reading! 

~Rida <3

<< There was still a chance to be happy >> 

Nineteen | Finally Gone 

H a r i s: 

When I woke up the next day, there was a heavy weight on the bottom of my stomach and I had this urge to run away from the world, where problems didn't exist. I didn't know what the weight was trying to tell me or why I wanted to escape, all of a sudden or why my heart was sinking, to rest atop the weight; just to make it more heavy. 

I should have been excited. Today was the day when I left from HAU and tried to chase my dreams until I had them right inside my hands, close to my heart. 

But somehow, all I felt was something bad and I didn't know how to describe the feeling because I had never felt it before. With the pressure pulling me down, I forced myself to get up and ready because I was leaving. 

Maybe it was anxiety to get away from this world, right in to another where no one knew me and I could remake myself; not as the boy who didn't know who his parents were, but as the boy who dreamed and the boy who worked hard to accomplish it annd as the boy who did accomplish it. 

I was about to jump in a tree, unfamiliar to me and maybe the leaves wouldn't be hostile and throw me away. And maybe, my maybe really doesn't exist, because I had never had a problem fitting in before.

I thanked God for it because when I saw Daniya, I realized just how much being an outcast could affect you. I still didn't understand why everyone had bullied her and thrown her aside as if she were a failure. 

She was not. 

She shone as bright as the Sun, so bright that no one could look at her even though they should have been thanking her because of the light she emitted. 

She could reach the clouds and touch the skies, hell, she had a better chance than me and she was definitely not a failure. I just wished she could see that, pass the pointy branches that came in her way, to see her destination; which was, without doubt, better than ours. 

Sure, she had flaws but she had undeniable talent too. I had seen her grades in high school and I had seen her write the most heart-wrenching words of all. I had seen her fight through all that came in her way. I had seen her stand until one day, she realized that she had to break down. 

I just hoped she'd see it one day too. 

I came across her father when I had finished eating breakfast and was venturing back towards my room to finish the last minute packing I had to do. HAU was a two-hour train ride away and I had to be quick if I wanted to catch my train. 

"Hey, kid," Uncle Suleiman said.

I nodded at him, "Salam, Uncle." 

He seemed pleased. He had forever been teaching me about the rituals of Islam and what I should and what I should not do. I guess it made him happy that he was successful. Just like I felt when the price was handed to me, as if my heart had suddenly grown lighter and flowers had blossomed right inside it, permeating a happy odor. 

"Walaikum'Assalam," He said. "Do you have a minute? I really need to talk to you." 

"Sure. Why don't you come up to my room?" I offered.

He agreed and followed me to my now-clean room. The only reason I invited him up here was because it didn't look like a post-tornado area now. Otherwise, the living room would have been just fine. 

"I talked to Daniya," He started. 

I should have known it was about her. He scarcely talked to me, after all and it was mostly because of his daughter. I couldn't blame him. Daniya deserved his love. 

"And I found out about her...confession to you. Now, son, I don't blame you for not loving her - because you can't control what your heart feels - but please, be careful when you talk to her. Don't lead her on or give her hope. In fact, I'd prefer if you do not talk to her. It'd be so much better for her.

She's practically dying from the inside, Haris. And I am so worried and I feel so freaking guilty because I never noticed it before. But you knew, didn't you? And you didn't tell me. 

I won't tell you off because it'd do no good but please, if she's facing something like this and you know of it, try your best to tell it to me, no matter how much she protests. You don't want her to go in to depression, do you?" 

I nodded respectfully, "Of course, Sir." 

He rubbed his temples, "I also want to thank you."

"For what?" I asked, surprised. 

"Daniya told me about the first time you swooped in and saved her from the stupid little brat who bullied her. You've done it one or two times, more, right?" 

"But I didn't do my best. I could have prevented-" 

"What's done is done, Haris. Don't guilt yourself. Just be careful next time. And good luck with your university. I'll pray for you." 

I smiled because a prayer was the best gift you could give anyone, "Jazak'Allah."

He nodded and after a few awkward moments of silence, he decided that it was best that he left. 

He wasn't good at bonding but he could be the softest person when it came to his daughter. He was like a stone that emitted water, only, when it caught sight of his daughter. 

My two small bags stood right beside the door. 

I was leaving. Away from the house that I had dwelled in for years and away, maybe, from all the problems. As soon as I would step out of this house, I had a chance to become a new Haris. 

One that didn't run away like a coward. 

Aunty Tahira let loose a few tears and squeezed me so hard that I had to protest because I was afraid she'd stop my breathing. 

Daniya didn't come down and I wondered if she would. Maybe I should have gone up and bid her goodbye, but for some illogical reason, I left without a glance backward. 

I stepped in to the car with Uncle Suleiman and we both drove towards the station. He smiled at me and after exchanging a quick goodbye and a half hug, I jumped from their tree to the tree of HAU. 

Even though, I was happy to be away, to be finally gone, there was some part of me that was tugging me away; that told me that I'd end up once again like the street boy who survived off cherries.