Unlucky is the nickname

#1

              "When will you learn no one wants you at this home?" My dad said in a serious tone while we were having a dinner. I felt warmness at my leg and saw my little brother was holding it so thightly to give me support under the table. I smiled a little to tell him I'm okay. He was the reason why I don't leave this house. I'm in charge of cleaning, cooking, babysitting and other houseworks at this home.

              "I already know dad." I said when I gained a little confidence back. I wasn't looking at him cause I was scared of his fierce eyes. I have been getting treated like that since I remember. I should have been used to it already but everyday he surprised me with his threats.
 
               "That's a good thing. Now go to your room. You face looks shitty I can't stand anymore." He said. I looked at him to see if he was serious and saw him looking at me in disgust. I checked on my mom and she was eating his dish like nothing happens her right side of the bed. I saw my little sister eating her food like my mom too. I sighed and moved to my room.

              My room is literally the only place I enjoy being. It has been my escape place for 16 years now. "Go to you room!" "Why are you sitting with us, get into your cave!" "Do you think you are wanted here? Leave now!" "Leave." "Your room. Now" these are the codes for me to go to room and I get new codes everyday cause he get creative with it.

             I sat down on my ground and lean my back to my bed. I opened my music player and put some music on. I need to relax and forget what happened, again. After hours of music listening and being alone, I decided to check if they are sleeping now. I opened the door a little to see if tv room is empty and it was.

            I stepped out my room and lead to kitchen to get some food. I put some on my dish and get myself a little piece of bread. I was in front of my room in the hall when I hear a door crack. I freeze where I was in shock. Please don't be my dad. Please don't be my dad.

          "Canny?" A sleepy voice called over. I look at the direction and saw a sleepy Murat on the other sode of hallway. I shushed him and run into my room and put the dish to my desk and went back to his direction.

         He wrapped his arms around my neck and took a deep breath of my scent. I honestly wanna know how is he so pure inside of this shitty life. I hope he never changes.

         "Can I sleep with you together, tonight?" He asked with begging eyes. His lips were pouty. I nodded my head cause if we sleep together my mom gets jealous of our relation and takes him away from me. How can a parent gets jealous of their children's relation, I'll never understand this.

          "You know if we do, mom gonna met mad at me." I said in a sad mood. He agreed me with a head nod. My baby is so understanding.

           "Let's get you to your room" I said while leading to my siblings room. I put him on his bed and kissed on forhead.

           "Don't be sad why my dad says, you know he doesn't mean it. He is just, mad." He said while looking at me in a broken smile.

           "Shhh, this is not what you think about st night. You'll go to kindergarten tomorrow, now sleep." I said. He smiled widely after hearing he will leave for school. He loves leaving the house like me.

            I went back to my room and ate my dish then I slept. Another shitty day ended without me dying gladly.

      You all, I don't know if I really write down what happens in my life cause I've been suffering a lot by myself and it's been a lot to suffer all alone. I stopped writing my other stories cause I was suffering and tried to commit suicide. Honestly my life goes downhill and I don't know what to do anymore. So I decided to try this way and let all this things out since I can't go to police or live alone cause I'm still a student and I have no income or somewhere to live. TELL ME IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO SEE MORE OF THIS STORY ILL CONTINUE WITH %100000 HONESTY. All the love, this loser. 💜🙏🏻