Prologue

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Inanimate objects have the best stories.  Like, I once knew a whiteboard pen which had unspeakable things done to it- he had been chewed, burned, and deformed before resting at the bottom of the fish tank for a year.  Horrible.  An absolute tragedy.  Anyway, I decided to document the my experience of deskhood, because, well, it's a fascinating story.  Like, seriously.  Read it.

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