what's my name

The War I Always Fought

I slowed my pace as my heart accelerated, nearing the corner of chestnut Avenue I held my breath in anticipation. I knew what was coming, I knew he would hurt me. He always did. And I time and time again forgave him for the harm he had caused me. I saw a couple that day, arm in arm,chatting like they hadn't a care in the world. What I would have gave not to know what suffering feels like. I was undeniably becoming conscious of the fact I had frozen, mid stride, in the middle of the street and had probably looked like an idiot.

The uneven padding of feet trampling the autumn leaves startled me in my wake. It was him, the man I had so desperately tried to avoid. My father. His sleeves were rolled up to elbow level as he drew his hand back. I looked up for a brief moment only to catch the eye of our audience. Raymas Lewis looked upon us from afar. I waited for the impact of the back of his hand to meet my face. Within milliseconds it came,i held back a sob as Raymas watched in shock horror. His hair was sleek and ink black as his ocean blue eyes set ablaze at the sight.

I sat in the alley that night as I did every night, that is where I was put and I learnt to deal with it. Atop a pile of black bags I made my bed, consisting of nothing but another bag for a blanket... If I was lucky. My father had had his play with me, I had swollen lips, black eyes and he hadn't fed me for weeks. I Sat and listened to the thundering of my stomach, when a slick black fugue emerged from the drain. Observing optimistically I put a pale finger to my purple lips and sighed. It was only a rat, and even it scurried away. No one wanted to be around me.. Not even a rat.

Suddenly, light gentle footsteps hit the pavement at the mouth of the alley and took off running. One thing was for sure who ever it was was not my father, but they were approaching fast..before I had time to think,ray's strong arms were around me and I was crying. Again. Ray didn't let go not even when I stopped crying. The soft gentle touch of his fingers as he tucked a strand of hair behind my ears, startled me. I'd never received such kindness.
"why would he do this to you?" Raymas was dumbfounded by what he had seen earlier.
"why are you asking me? If I knew I would have changed that by now." my voice echoed limply inside my mind. I didn't even recognize my own words. Who was I? What was I doing? Why hadn't I fought back?

"this... I can't even think how anyone would deserve this. It's not right."
"its reality Raymas. This is my reality."
"no! This is abuse, not reality!" Raymas thundered clearly annoyed by my remark. "that's it I'm not putting up with this." Raymas grabbed my wrists and let out a squeal of horror.
"Leona! You're so thin. I fear if I hold you too tightly I could break you." Raymas' voice was soft and concerned.
"I know." my voice only a whisper sounded foreign to me.
Before I had time to try to convince Raymas (and myself) that I was OK, Ray picked me up in his arms. I must have been as light as a feather to him and his vampire strength.

"you're coming with me, Leona I won't let you stay here and be abused any longer. If only I had seen before, then maybe you would have never got into this dire state."
My body was weak and I could not move all but for a simple nod of the head before my body collapsed in on its self.