The Secret Life of Postgraduates

Meeting the Inmates (unedited)

January – the following year

A month before the rest of campus would arrive, Maddie and the other new postgraduates received a week of training in research (none of which she would remember afterward), and three boring sessions of ethics. What stood out was how her former lecturers attitudes had changed toward them. Suddenly they were no longer annoying undergraduates, they were colleagues. Equals.

Once the boring administrative part was concluded, they were finally released into their respective departments and the world of academics. The other two pharmacology first year master's students (first years for short, not to be confused with the undergraduate first years), Maddie knew mostly by sight. Stacy Cavanaugh was among the top ten of their class, and Hannah Lewis – an awkward creature she'd worked on projects with – was obsessed with prestige and doing well.

I do not belong here, Maddie thought as the three of them sat in the tea room across from Prof Koch.

"I just want to go through the house rules before I introduce you to everyone."

A lot of the rules were obvious and self-explanatory. Respect for each other. What times they had to be in the office. Their duties as academic interns.

"What about dress code?" Maddie asked, thinking of her collection of Marvel t-shirts and how expensive it would be to acquire a new wardrobe.

"Regular clothes like you'd have worn to class," Prof Koch shrugged. "Within reason. It's probably not necessary to tell you not to show up in your shortest 'sjoe-broekie'."

They all nodded solemnly.

Prof Koch then took them down the hall, popping in at every office and introducing the prof or doc to the new postgraduates. Everyone was so friendly and nice; like they were actual humans!

Along the way a young woman in gym clothes – leggings and a tank top – practically ran past. "Oh, Lauren," Prof Koch stopped her in her tracks. "These are the new M's," she introduced them one by one.

"Hi," Lauren greeted breathlessly. "I'm Lauren. Sorry if I forget your names," she shot rapid-fire and was off again, her dark braid flying behind her.

The office at the far end was to be their new abode for the next two years. There were four second years (master's) and three PhD students, of which three were currently in the office. Lauren, the girl who'd raced past, was one of the PhD students. Prof Koch introduced them to the ones present: The PhD called Mike, with the most restless hands Maddie had ever seen (his fingers constantly moved as if he was playing air-piano or imitating a spider with Tourette's), the frankly scary Inge (also PhD), and a ray of sunshine by the name of Natalie.

"You'll meet the rest as you go along," Prof Koch smiled. "But here you go! Welcome to pharmacology. We're very happy to have you here."

And with that they were alone.

"You can choose any one of the empty desks," Natalie waved at the far end of the room.

As is second-nature to humans, the first years flocked together and chose three adjoining desks.

"I'm going to cover my space with pictures of my dog!" Hannah whispered. "Do you guys think I can bring a waffle maker?"

"A waffle maker?" Maddie repeated.

"Yeah, I've always wanted an office with a waffle maker."

"Is that even allowed?" Stacy whispered. "And do you think we can bring our own food? Because I am not living on caff food for the rest of the year."

"I think so," Maddie shrugged. "We could ask one of the older people?"

"Won't that be weird?" Hannah intervened.