Selflessness
Unspoken Words
Without thinking, she stripped herself of her scrubs and hopped in the shower. She needed to wash the events of the day off of her body and possibly, her mind. As she scrubbed herself clean, her mind wandered back to the hospital.
She thought about talking to Ruby and then, all of a sudden, looking up and there stood Mr. Clark with a loaded gun in his hand. She looked to Arizona, who automatically noticed the look in her eye, and did the one thing Callie was willing her with no words, not to do. She turned around.
Callie shuddered at the thought. So many things could have happened. So many things could have gone wrong. She tried to rid her mind of the thoughts because they were okay. Both she and Arizona were okay and they made it out alive.
Stepping out of the shower, she wrapped herself in a towel and made her way back into the room. Grabbing a pair of underwear, she slipped them on and quickly dressed in her nightgown and robe. She towel dried her hair and made her way into the kitchen. Taking down two glasses, she immediately popped the cork on the red wine and poured herself a glass.
Callie sat at the island in her kitchen mindlessly tracing her finger around the top of her glass. After the two women had shared the kiss, Arizona insisted that Callie should go home and try to unwind because she had some things to do before she could leave the hospital for good. She assured the Latina that she would meet her there as soon as she possibly could. Though reluctant, Callie finally agreed and made her way across the street and to her empty apartment.
Her mind wandered back to the fight they had before transporting Ruby to an empty room and before hell and fear had consumed their every being all at once.
"When are you going to forgive me for not being a good enough lesbian for you?" Callie asked, rolling up her sleeves.
Arizona looked at her incredulously, "When you do something to convince me that you're falling in love with me and not with being in love. When you do something to convince me that I'm different from George O'Malley, Erica Hahn, Mark Sloan, or the girl at the coffee cart. I mean, you have a huge heart and I love that about you, but I don't trust you. Why would I?" Arizona spat.
The scene played over and over again in her head. Why would Arizona trust her? It was true, after all, that she was always known as the girl who said 'I Love You' first. She was always the one to lay her feelings out on the table. With George, she had married him in a chapel in Vegas, yes, but she took the wedding seriously. She had come to believe that she loved him and she even took it so far as to voice her emotions, to which he never returned. With Erica, she had gotten scared and run off to Mark Sloan in an attempt to 'prove that she was indeed gay' and Mark Sloan? Well, he was a different story all together. They had had a few rumbles in a few on-call rooms here and there, but there was never a love there. They were always friends first.
But Arizona was right, what made her different from all the others? What made Arizona stand out from everyone else? Callie sighed as she thought about the question that seemed to weight heavy on her heart.
Making her way onto the couch, her mind drifted to the second argument, before Ruby's appendix had burst.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. I don't deserve this, okay? I have treated you with nothing but respect and love..." Arizona started, but Callie quickly cut her off.
"Oh no, see, that's the thing. You think you have, but you haven't."
"I'm sure that it feels great to act like I'm the bad guy, but that's the biggest load of you know what that I've ever heard." Arizona retorted, looking Callie dead in the eye.
