Laine Transformation

Chapter Two

My memories of holidays past aren't particularly illuminating or fond. My childhood Christmas's, Thanksgivings, and Easters were trying while family we only saw once a year bickered and forced small talk. The most memorable to this date and time is the Christmas I met Killian Thomas.

I'd been working at O's for a little over a year at the time when I'd really noticed I developed a following of regular patrons, most recognizable being Killian. I first took an interest of him when I put together that he was the beautiful man at The Broken Key so many months ago. Like clock work, every Friday he'd arrive towards the end of my shift with a new girl on his arm week by week. He always tipped me $15 on two Old Styles. He'd sit until close in my section those nights, almost as if he wanted my attention, but I never paid him much of it. I knew the fast type of guy he was. Still, I convince myself for months he comes in with the same routine because of my good service. I never thought it would be because he'd taken an interest in me

I used to look up frequently from cleaning tables or rolling silver ware and he'd be staring at me with a locked gaze the nights he didn't leave with one of the girls he'd come in with. Every part of me knew he wasn't to be trusted, but every part of me was craving to be spontaneous and reckless for a change.

Reflecting on those moments now, I can see what I was drawn to him. I'd experienced so little of life, I felt robbed of not knowing anything other than what a small town had to offer. He seemed to have all the answers and ways to get them because of how smooth he was. I can say at the time I met him and there on I loved him with such intensity that I'd put him on a high pedestal that was too high for me to climb. I dreamed of being as important and impressive as him. In a way, being with him made me feel like I was valuable.

I knew the night I met him I should have walked away but I ignored every sign because I wanted to break loose. That moment, the one that would change everything as foreshadowed was Christmas Day 2015.

My auto-pilot mode was in full swing while pretending it doesn't bother me that I can't afford to go home and spend the holiday with my family, dysfunction and all. My grey t-shirt and black denim jeans are filled with not only beer from cleaning dirty glasses and spilling, but yesterday's pizza and today's Chinese takeout. The efforts the distract myself are there but slowly dying with each tick of the clock that afternoon.

O's is a complete ghost town after 3:30 so I finally decide it best to clock out and have a beer while rubbing at yesterday's makeup still on my face. Chuck and I cheers down a couple shots while he sits on a stool behind the bar. A couple minutes feels like hours until the phone rings, making both of us jump up unexpectedly in the silence.

John is on the line asking how the bar is doing in sales and eventually taking pity on us for having to work any longer. Chuck relays the message from John that he demands we start to drink on the house now as we close, so he promptly pulls out two shot glasses and our boss directed. We both pretend to be enthused but neither one of us really wants to be here on this gloom filled holiday, in the end we're both just spreading our misery onto each other.

The 5 p.m mark hits when Chuck actually starts taking the bar apart, piece by piece. I can tell something is wrong with him, but he finally publicizes his discontent when he lets out a huge sigh and throws down two more shot glasses.

" Billie didn't invite me to Christmas with her family on the Southside today so I told John I wanted to open the bar." His brutish exterior indicates this isn't what he really wants. " Holiday's are always over glorified and always suck. I guess it's probably a good thing I wasn't there today." His presence indicates that he's hurt and bitter by the act. I can relate, no one wants to be without their loved ones on holidays, not even me despite my circumstances.