I remember all the pain.
I remember it all from that day.
He packed up and just walked away,
Leaving me with tears streaming down my face.
It's hard to process when you're eight.
I'll be right back he said;
I guess we must be in different time zones.
Since when is five years coming right back?
No words being exchanged.
What was I to do without my role model?
Since when is crying yourself to sleep ok?
Since when is feeling worthless,
Feeling like you weren't enough alright?
Is that really how an eight year old should feel?
I guess it was a sign,
Because that's exactly what I feel now.
I can never do anything right.
Even when I try my hardest.
I want to make her feel proud.
I want to make up for all those punches.
The ones I was too young to protect her from.
The ones I was old enough to remember.
People wonder why I'm a pacifist,
I guess this is the reason.
I never want to see that look on her face ever again.
I never want to see her shed tears.
She's my everything;
She's the one I'm afraid to lose.
I love her with all my heart.
I would give up everything for her,
Just like I know she would and has for me.
I want to be as strong as she is.
She's my Wonder Woman.
But I always seem to be Cheetah.
I'm everything she didn't want.
I can't wear a dress,
It just isn't me.
But for her, I will.
I can't marry some guy,
It's not who I am.
But if that's her wish,
Then that's what I'll do.
I will be whoever she wants me to be.
It's the least I can do,
After all she's done for me.
After all I've put her through.
I guess you can say trust is an issue.
But after being left by everyone I've truly cared about,
It's kind of hard to believe in anyone.
Especially when I don't even believe in myself.
With the people I've grown up with,
It makes sense.
But then there's you...
