She & Him

~1~

Even after everything that had happened, he still revolved his entire world around her.

They used to be close friends, never to be separated, never to be forgotten. Despite the fact they were polar opposites, they remained together through it all. She, shy and introverted. He, hyperactive and extroverted. Nobody would pair these two together, or even merely think they were close, but they were wrong.

These two were paired together by fate and fate alone.

Back in kindergarten, she would be reading a book, and he would rush up to her, begging and insisting that she play with him. "Pleaaase?" He'd say, "Pretty pretty please, with a cherry on top?" He'd whine. She would always give in eventually, and join him in the sandpit, or play pirates with him, sometimes they'd even paint together. But they remained strong friends.

In primary, she would be eating lunch all alone, swinging her legs, alone with her thoughts, and he would suddenly run towards her, and smother her in a huge bear hug. He would crack a joke, and she would laugh, and giggle at them every time. He would do silly things, like stick his tongue out at people he didn't know, or make funny gestures at people. She would only playfully scold him, saying "You're being such a meanie-head," and they would continue laughing. Sometimes he would get hurt, and that was okay too. Because she was always there to fix him up again.

During intermediate, sometimes she would read a book instead of eat. Sometimes, the other girls would sneer at her, call her boring, even pathetic, or lazy. He would run over to her, sit beside her, and start eating, talking about nothing and everything at the same time. She would speak in a simple, yet polite manner, while he would blabber on as much as he liked. They were relaxed in each others' presence, and always enjoyed what little time they had together. Her quiet aura, and his happy one. After all, they were the closest of friends, right?

But highschool, you may ask. What happened to them then?

That was when fate decided they were not meant to be with one another, when it decided the key did not fit the lock.

It started like usual, she would be alone, drawing, reading, maybe listening to music, and he would rush over and wrap his arms around her in a tight bear hug. She would roll her eyes playfully, and they would go back to talking, possibly continuing conversations. They would repeat this daily, but as this had becone the norm... Feelings had begun to bloom inside him.They weren't like a flame, as you'd suspect, passionate and burning. No, they were like a seed, delicate and precious. Something to water with your throughts, and let bloom. The seed grew from a sprout, to a blossom. A blossom to a flower. A flower down to more seeds, which grew into more sprouts, more blossoms, more flowers. The growing love was becoming too much for him, he was infatuated with her little habits, her playful actions. But no matter, how smart she had become, she remained oblivious to the flower gardens inside his heart. He began to distance himself from her, thinking the flowers would wilt if he stopped watering them with thoughts about her. But this only caused them to bloom more. She only grew confused as he became further and further away. Like if she ran towards him, he would only run away. Eventually, she became concerned. He was the only one she could talk to, without him... What would she do?

Finally she confronted him. After weeks of growing distant, it was only once a week that he'd visit her, but he would no longer wrap her in his warm embrace. Nor would he turn up happy and smiling. He would sit beside her, and admire her features silently, while she would draw or read.

So one day, when he came a-walking along, she approached him. The mere glimmer of worry in her eyes, her concerned expression, made him worry as well. What had he done wrong? Of course, he was unaware that he was her only friend, her best friend. But only a friend.

It escaped as an incoherent mumble at first, her pink lips barely moving as she spoke. Her worries spilling out. But when he said he couldn't hear, she said it louder.

"Why do you appear so distant from me?" She said. "Are you going to leave me?" Her voice becoming quieter with each question, each concern, that she spilled.

He widened his eyes in fear. He did not want her to find out about the flower garden inside of him, that he would tend to every day. "No, it's just.." He couldn't say it, couldn't voice this feeling he had. "If a blooming flower is your love for another, is it okay to have a whole garden inside you?"

She appeared rather amused by his antics, mood changing very quickly. "So you have fallen for another? Tell me, who is this mystery girl? Maybe I can.. Help."

But at this statement, he only sighed. "She's quiet, a-and shy.. The sweetest person I-I've ever met.. Th-The light o-of my wh-whole l-life," He began breaking down into sobs, a gripping feeling of anxiety and heartbreak closing around his heart. "I want t-to ca-call her mine, b-but, I know she'll never love me."

In that instant, she knew he was talking about her. "I.. I'm..." She breathes out, shocked. "I'm sorry.. I.. Can't accept... Your feelings...."

He looked at her, tears welling up in his eyes again, and his only response was a nod, as if saying, 'I understand'. She too, felt her heart crack into pieces, for she had just lost the biggest piece of herself. Her best friend. He was internally wrecked as he left, shoulders slouched and head hanging low.

For the following weeks, everyone noticed how they became more secluded than usual. He would wander the school grounds, and she would sit alone by the trees. But he still tended to the garden he created, somewhat happy. The same could not be said for her.

She had now harbored feelings of guilt, mustering demons from within her heart, haunting thoughts that would bleed into her mind, and leave sharp stings of anxiety.

But after a while, she forgot the guilt. The pain of rejecting someone. She starting morphing into an entirely different person, while he remained in suffering. Every time he approached her, or tried to, she would scoff and leave with her new 'friends'.

But he still revolved his entire world around her. He would still approach her from time to time, almost reviving the demons of guilt inside her. He would appear vividly in her life. Like how sharpies bleed through paper, how blood stains through bandages.

He would fall through holes into her life, like Alice falling into Wonderland.

He had become bleeding pages of her former life.