The Heart Of The Warrior (Rollo Lothbrok x OFC)

Chapter 21

  (A/N sorry for a shorter upload than the last two chapters, I plan to make up for this with more ASAP Also, P.S I changed the story title :D I'm sure you noticed haha sorry if there's any confusion, I've been meaning to do this for a while as I had a new cover made x )   

Kari sat up in her bed, her eyes sore from crying. Walking silently through the hut she made her way into Rollo's room, Siggy had surly left to go find Ragnar already. Walking over she sat on the bed beside him, reaching for his hand she held it tightly. "I'm so sorry" she cried, her voice cracking softly, Rollo looked at Kari confused, too sore to sit up, his hand guided hers up to his mouth and he kissed it softly "For what?" he mumbled "Rollo... I had no idea.. but before we left to raid, I was with child" she felt such a fool for not knowing, that it was her fault this had happened. Rollo thought for a moment "Was?..." his voice caught in his throat. "Please forgive me" Kari sobbed, Rollo took her hand in his, kissing it softly "It is not your fault, you didn't know... but I Floki told me, he told me what that monster Horik did to you, and I swear when I heal I will kill him" his voice was horse as his ribbed ached when he spoke. Kari wiped her eyes and smirked causing Rollo to chuckle "What?" he asked "You will be too late I'm afraid, he has confided in Floki and said he plans to kill Ragnar and his sons. We are going to kill him tonight. I was just about to leave before I came in here to tell you" she couldn't help but giggle at the idea of watching the life drain from Horik's face. Rollo raised an eyebrow and smirked. "Grab my axe. At the risk he goes to Valhalla... I don't want him going there as a man..." Rollo grinned Kari nodded, leaning down she placed a soft kiss on his forehead before grabbing his axe from the beside table. Making her way silently through the night she went to meet Ragnar in the longhouse.

Standing in the shadows of the longhouse, Horik and his son had lead their men to the hall, their victory seemed inevitable. The next few minutes passed quickly Horik's men were killed leaving only he and his son standing before a hall full of Ragnar's allies. Floki emerged from the back of the hall, stalking as he walked, one shoulder lower than the other. "Floki, you have betrayed the gods" Horik declared, Floki giggled "No. I have only betrayed you... I have always remained true to the gods.. and Ragnar" his eyes were dark, he giggled. "Ragnar. If you can find it in your heart... I ask that you spare my son" Horik pleaded, he room fell silent. Taking a step forward Horik was met with Lagertha's sword to his back, followed by another strike, Torstein, Bjorn, each taking their shot. Floki walked over as Horik fell to his knees, placing a hand on the side of his face, turning it to look at him before he away. Kari's body was filled with rage at the presence of Horik, but goosebumps covered her skin as each strike hit him. Walking over Horik's eyes locked with Kari's and filled with dread. Kneeling in front of him she held up Rollo's axe to his face, letting the sharp edge slide softly against his skin, not hard enough to leave a mark. She pressed it a little harder as it slide down his neck, her eyes glow a storm as she did not break contact with his own brown ones. He saw the storm swirl in her eyes before he saw his own fear in the reflection. A great sense of dread overcame him as the axe left his neck. A smirk crawling onto the corner of her lips as the used the shape edge to slice a line down the front of his trousers. Not another second passed before he felt seering pain radiate from his groin. Kari smiled wider as he cried out in pain. "The greatest pleasure in my life is knowing you'll never die a man... only a failure, filth, and a coward." she cursed at him, her voice only loud enough for him to hear. Standing up her hand dripped with blood, the axe in the other. With a smile on her face she walked away, out of the hall, she would not stay to witness his true death, for she watched the life leave his eyes herself, she watched fear creep into his soul and only dread was left behind. That was what he deserved. 

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A year passed so quickly that it seemed the blink of an eye, Kari watched the shore, the ice slowly breaking over the ocean. They would return to Wessex when the ice had completely melted, Kari awaited that day anxiously. Kari had left Rollo's after she lost the child. She could not bare to think of it, instead, she helped Helga care for Angrboda, watching Floki so deeply happy surrounded by his family was a sight Kari never thought she would see. She could sense it terrified him though. Kari had become Aunty to Angrboda, whom eagerly awaited one of her great stories before bedtime each night, Floki and Helga loved to listen as well, curled up by the fire, each night grew more content than the last. Kari felt out of place in the family though, even though she was warmly welcomed, she wanted her own family.

Soon came time to return to Kattegat, Floki was all too keen to finally leave, family life was scary for him, the thought caused Kari to chuckle to herself. Walking down the pier Kari carried her things and placed them down in Ragnar's ship. Turning around and looking at everyone saying goodbye to their loved ones Kari saw Rollo for the first time in what seemed like forever. He looked good, healed, but troubled. Looking down to pier to where his eyes were busy gazing she saw Siggy, who seemed to care very little that he was leaving, she seemed cold. She had actually hoped that her leaving would help them mend their torn relationship, Rollo deserved a loving wife, but it hadn't helped at all, if anything things seemed colder. 

Kari was pulled from her thoughts by the welcoming smile of Lagertha and warm hug, it had been so long since Lagertha had been in Kattegat, her own earldom being her priority. Kari felt an odd sensation as Lagertha hugged her, her mind grew foggy and for a moment she thought she may have a vision, but it faded. Kari had not had a vision since the night she saw Odin carry away the child. Her stomached turned and she felt sick thinking about it. Her eyes watering. "Kari, are you okay?" Lagertha asked Kari nodded "Yes, I'm fine, just... remembered something. I was actually going to go speak to-" Lagertha smiled and cut her off "Rollo?" she asked Kari blushed "I hope you were going to say Rollo, since I arrived yesterday he has not stopped asking about if you were raiding with us" she smirked, Kari blushed again "Yes, I was going to talk to him. Things seemed cold between him and Siggy" she spoke and Lagertha nodded "It has been hard for Siggy to let go of her past, she was once a queen and now..." she stopped herself when she noticed Rollo walking over "anyway, it's good to see you Kari" Lagertha smiled and bid her goodbye as she went to talk to Bjorn. 

Kari turned on her heels and came face to face with Rollo who was stood right behind her. He seemed happy to see her, but still sort of annoyed. "Hello Rollo" Kari broke the silence "how have you been?" she added quickly, he shrugged "I healed. Managed to climb out of bed one day only to find you'd ran away from me. Again..." he mumbled Kari bit her lip "I told myself I couldn't keep you on a chain but I damn near wish I could, because each time it hurts more" he added, his voice low and sad. "I'm sorry. I was going through a lot, I lost the..and then I felt like a monster, and being around you reminded me of it everyday and I couldn't heal myself" she explained, her voice quiet as she looked down. Rollo reached up and held her chin, lifting it to look at him, her eyes had watered slightly. "I couldn't bare to hurt you, I have too many times before, I'm glad you took care of yourself when I couldn't be there for you..." he paused for a moment and couldn't help but smile. "We've had quite the crazy few years..." he chuckled "In all this time I've never once stopped caring about you, and that child would have been the best thing I've ever done. But the gods could see, they must have, that I was not worthy of that gift. I'm sorry for that" his lips tightened into a line as he swallowed hard, like there was a lump in his throat. Kari's eyes watered and a stray tear danced down her cheek, Rollo wiped it and forced a smile "come on, boats are leaving soon, and If I know you, you'll need someone to sit with when the waves start to get out of control" he reached for her hand and lead her to sit with him down the front of the boat. 

Kari was speechless, she didn't know what to say to what he'd just said. She didn't know what the future held for herself, she didn't know where her heart would lead her. But when the seas grew angry and the waves crashed, in his arms, pressed to his chest she felt safe. She could never be sure if Rollo would ever fully open his heart to her, or if he could just settle for having a family and not glory. Floki's words echoed in her head

                           "A warrior never shows his heart, until the axe reveals it."