I hope my few remaining friends give up on trying to save me, I hope I come up with a failsafe plot to piss off the dumb few that forgave me, I hope the fences I mended fall down beneath their own weight, I hope I hang on past the last exit, I hope it's already too late, and I hope the junkyard a few blocks from here someday burns down, and I hope the rising black smoke carries me far away, and I never come back again. I hope I lie, and tell everyone you were worth fighting for and I hope I die, I hope lie. I hope I cut myself shaving tomorrow, I hope it bleeds all day long, my friends say it's darkest before the sun rises, I'm pretty sure they're all wrong.
I hope it stays dark forever, I hope the worst isn't over, I hope you blink before I do, and I hope I never get sober, and I hope when you think of me years down the line, you can't find one good thing to say, and I hope that if I'd found the strength to walk out, you'd stay the hell out of my way. I am drowning, there is no sign of land, you are coming down with me, hand in unlovable hand and I hope I die, I hope I lie. I hoped you loved me.
