Omniscience (Death Note Fanfic)

Chapter 1 - Controlled Implosion

Despite his carefully controlled behavior, perfect manners and astounding appearance, Light Yagami was a creature of impulse.

It might have actually been the reason for his OCD and obsession with control. His emotions tended to overpower his mind, amplified by some unknown flame deep within him; maybe it was pride, that arrogance of his that accompanied his every move. Or, it was simply his nature. A cold, brilliant mind, ruled by a heart of fire.

 Rather, a heart of gasoline. Waiting for something to light it up, to give his hidden passion and enormous potential a purpose. That’s what it felt like until the Kira case, at least. Like he was a zombie, dead inside, going through the motions of a life he barely recognized anymore; his sense of justice was, indeed, a great motivator, but still… he threw himself into work and hated Kira with such passion just because he could.

…And let’s not forget the fifty days of imprisonment, those horrible moments when he thought he was going to die by his father’s hand and the fact that he was chained to a sugar-addicted, insomniac, freak… all courtesy of Kira. Kira had turned his life upside down, reduced it to something that didn’t truly belong to him anymore. Not entirely. He didn’t call the shots anymore, because he was a suspect; and not just a suspect, L’s suspect, a Kira suspect. To say he didn’t hate Kira for all of it would be a lie. However… it was a change, a novelty in his mechanical life. It gave him something to focus on, and it felt exhilarating.

That’s why, deep down, he knew Ryuzaki was right. No one else but him could have been Kira; forget the evidence, he simply fit the psychological profile 100%. That self-righteousness, his anger against the world, the sheer idealism of his beliefs, and that flame inside him… he knew that if he had found the means to kill someone with only a name and a face, he’d twist himself enough to believe that what he was doing was right.

And then there was those… holes. Those damn missing parts in his memory, things he did without remembering the reasons, actions that made no sense. Light was also a creature of habit; breaking the pattern without knowing why fit very well with Ryuzaki’s theory – that he passed the power to kill along with his memories to someone else.

Light may have been conceited and slightly narcissistic, but he was – after all – a genius. Putting aside his hurt feelings and great desire to deny he could ever be Kira, logic told him that the spark was always there; and he remembered his father saying that it wasn’t the person that was evil; rather, it was the power to kill. So, what kind of monster could he become, being handed all that power on a silver platter?  

‘Ryuzaki?’ he said, tiredly, turning to the detective working next to him. ‘Can I ask you for something?’

 The strange man turned to face him, his dark obsidian eyes devoid of anything. It was strangely unnerving for Light; looking into his eyes, by comparison, he felt so human.

‘That depends on what you ask, Light-kun’, Ryuzaki answered.

Light knew he was likely going to refuse his request, and definitely raise his Kira-percentage, but he had to give it a shot. He knew he won’t sleep a wink until he confirmed or infirmed his suspicions.

‘May I see the videotapes of my confinement?’ he finally said, eyes carefully guarded, his voice betraying nothing.

Ryuzaki blinked.

‘Why?’ he asked, and strangely, he sounded so much like a child.

‘There’s something I want to see’, Light answered with a shrug.