The Pain On The Inside.

Chapter 1 - Heartbreak

If Usher can make millions on a break up, why cant i?

We all had that one person who you'd give your all and last to. Your LAST dime, the LAST piece of pizza, the LAST word of an argument.

But why would you do that? Because its called love and that's what people in love do.

People say those in love are destined to get hurt, its true 80% of the time. But what about the 20%?

They are actually happy. Im saying this now because i am part of that 80%, i thought i was one with the 20% but that was all a lie. A miscalculation by the woman i believed was another candidate to be "the one" for me.

Who am i kidding? I haven't found pure love at all in the years I been on the dating scene. Money, sex, prostitution, all different things but people say these are all part of love.

Does anyone really know the true meaning of love anymore? Apparently i don't, even though the heart should never lie about it. One way or another, it does. And because of it's betrayal, it's been hurt... repeatedly. Hurt so many times, its almost possible to get used to it. The feeling of your heart dropping into your stomach almost feels like a dessert. And who knows, that could be your last meal before going to bed everyday.

Its never easy letting go either. When that one person your determined to love and be loved by just gives up on you. Just stop calling, texting, replying back. Makes you feel empty because they meant so much in a short time. But while they meant the world to you, somebody else was meaning the world to them.

Not even looking eye to eye while next to each other, it's like they don't know your there. Then you know somebody else is more important, because they get on Facebook, Instagram, twitter, etc. They spend huge amounts of time on the social media talking to other people, instead of talking to the one person who says "you matter most to me" who's sitting right next to them.

So let this be a lesson, the heart will lie when the brain knows the obvious. True love never exists if your hurt just by trying to have a taste of it. And if that's the case then why say you love anybody? I don't know the answer but i gave up on love. If you got rejected so many times, you'll start to feel it physically. The pain on the inside.