Broken (Brown Eyed Boy book 2)

All Over Again (Carlos POV)

Everything that happened after Jessie closed her eyes on that roof was like deja vu. It was like I was sitting on the floor next to her in the middle of the street the day Jared hit her with his car. She didn't move and if it weren't that I was staring at her so hard, I probably wouldn't have noticed the slight rise and fall of her chest. When the ambulance and police showed up they all wanted to ask us questions but the only questions I could bring myself to answer at the moment was the paramedics. Jeremy and Samara talked to the police as they handcuffed a now regaining consciousness Michael and I followed the paramedics as they brought Jessie downstairs on the stretcher. Without them having to ask, I climbed into the truck behind them and immediately grabbed Jessie's hand again as they drove us to the hospital. The whole time there I willed her to open her eyes, even if for just a second so I would know she was going to be okay, but she never did.

            When we arrived at the hospital, the paramedics had to practically pry my hand from Jessie's and hold me back as the doctors showed up and took over. I would have followed them wherever they were taking her but they wouldn't let me no matter how hard I struggled. They seemed to realize that because they distracted me by suggesting I call her parents and let them know what happened. And that's when it really hit me that I had let her and her family down by letting Michael hurt her again. Her family still didn't know about him or what he had done to her but it didn't matter; what mattered was I didn't keep her safe like I promised I would.

            This time, I remembered calling Jessie's mom. I remembered her panicked tone as I told her what happened. I remembered the guilt I felt for having to tell her such a thing in the first place. I remembered talking to the police too, when they finally found me pacing the hall. I remembered telling them how I knew Jessie was in trouble. I remembered telling them that I pulled Michael off of her and punched him. I remembered the pitying look the officer gave me as I told him the story and my voice started to break when I mentioned Jessie. And I remembered him saying that everything would be fine and as far as he was concerned, me attacking Michael was in defense.

            Not long after he turned the corner down the hall, Jeremy and Samara came into view and rushed towards me. Samara bombarded me with questions on how Jessie was and each question made me feel guiltier until I suddenly felt claustrophobic. It was like the weight of the guilt and pain over what happened to Jessie was just too much for me and everything just started to close in. I rushed passed Samara and Jeremy without a word and straight out of the emergency room door, running straight into someone. “Sorry,” I mumbled, not even bothering to look up at them. I tried to walk passed them when Cassie suddenly appeared in front of me.

            “Carlos?” she said sadly and I stopped where I was.

            “Cassie?” I said in surprise, looking at the person I had run into and realizing it was my mom. “Mom?”

            “Honey,” she sighed and opened her arms to me. And for the first time in years I dropped myself into them and cried. “I'm so sorry. But Jessie will be fine, she's a strong girl.”

            “Carlos, have they said anything?” I heard Jessie's mom say from behind mine and I quickly looked up, wiping my face.

            “No ma'am,” I answered. She and Jessie's stepfather looked worried, making the guilt slam into me again. “I'm sorry.”

            “What for?” her mom asked.

            “I didn't get there fast enough,” I said. “If I would have realized where she was sooner and gotten there quicker than none of us would be here right now. So I'm sorry.”