Saviors [A SVU and Bensler Fan Fic]

[Chapter Thirty-Four]

"Olivia!" Serena yelled as I walked towards the library so I could study before a big test. I turned around and saw her walking towards me quickly, tears streaming down her face.

"Serena? What's wrong?" I asked quickly, and she got to me and wiped at her tears as she prepared to speak.

"I just got a call from your sister... Is she my daughter? Like really? This isn't just a sick joke?" Serena cried, and I swallowed hard.

"Serena, come on. Let's sit down, I can explain this all." I spoke, and she nodded tearfully.

I led her over to a bench, and then I grabbed a tissue from my bag and handed it to her. She wiped at her tears, before asking me again.

"Is Cynthia really my daughter?"

"Yeah, child protective services took her when she was born. She was born first, and they said you were in a really bad place so that is the reason behind them forcing you to surrender her." I spoke, as I grabbed her hand and squeezed it gently in my hand as she tried to think about what happened. 

How she was pregnant with two baby girls and was only told about one.

"How could they legally do that?" She questioned, as she wiped at her tears some more.

"I don't know, Serena. I just know that they did it and Cynthia was always told that you were dead, and she got a random last name and a random birthday. They really didn't care about you or me, they only cared about getting Cynthia into a safe home."

"How dare they take my baby." She huffed, as she stood and started to pace. People were watching, but I could care less. They can stare all they want, but I wasn't going to let Serena go home without knowing she's gonna be okay for a bit.

"If you and I can have a relationship together, you and Cynthia can too. I'll help if you need me too." I spoke, and she shook her head.

"No, I don't need your help. I'll do this by myself. God, she was supposed to be my daughter." She exclaimed, and I frowned deeply.

I wanted to really yell at her because if she had known about the fact she had twins, I would've been the one in foster care, but maybe Cynthia would've been actually loved because she wasn't me. Everyone loves Cynthia, but I'm just not as lovable as she is I guess.

"She's at home right now. You could go talk to her. She doesn't work until ten tonight, so use your time wisely." I spoke, before quietly standing and walking towards the library, leaving her alone on the bench.

[*]

I studied all night, and only went home when Elliot called me and asked me where I was.

And when I got home, I avoided the basement and decided to crash in Elliot's room, but to make Bernie and Joseph not kick me out, I was going to sleep on top of the blankets.

"Hey, when did you get home?" Elliot asked, as I walked into his room and slipped my hightops off.

"A few minutes ago. I was avoided home." I spoke, and he sighed.

"Well, Serena and Cynthia passed out downstairs, so you didn't have a spot to sleep down there or study anyway." He spoke, and I sighed.

"Great. I have to face them both in the morning. Attempting to talk to Cynthia is easier, but after what Serena and I talked about today, it's gonna be hard to see her."

"What did you two talk about?" Elliot questioned, and I frowned as I walked over and climbed on to the bed. I laid against his chest, and he slowly sank back onto his pillows as he waited for me to talk. 

But just thinking about talking to Elliot about what Serena said made me feel entitled and spoiled I guess. Like how I felt bad because she would rather have Cynthia as a daughter than me, but in reality, she'd probably be happier. Both of them.

"Never mind. I'm just gonna get some sleep, so please stop talking so I can get some rest." I spoke, and he shook his head as he kissed my head softly.

"What happened to make you put all of those walls up? I'm going to be your husband in a year, and I don't want you to keep your walls up to keep me out. I want you to let me in and then put them up."

"El, Serena just made a comment to me. Almost like she was saying I'm the reason why she didn't get Cynthia. Like neither of us were planned, but she really didn't think she'd get twins, and she didn't even know she was pregnant with two babies until Cynthia called her and told her." I huffed.

"She didn't mean it, Liv." He replied quickly, and I sighed as I shifted out of his arms and I laid flat on the bed. I moved my arms beneath my head, and I rolled my eyes at his statement.

"Did she mean to beat me for the first 7 years of my lives? Did she mean to make me feel like I was worthless and not worth any love whatsoever? Because if she didn't mean what she said today, she must've not meant what she did to me before." I huffed, before rolling over onto my side and closing my eyes.

"Can you just forgive and forget?" Elliot asked, and I stood up quickly and went to put my shoes back on.

"Liv, don't go!" Elliot exclaimed, but I just ignored him as tears ran down my cheeks. I grabbed my bag and threw it over my shoulder and went to leave, but Elliot wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed the back of my head. But I refused to stay. I'd rather sleep with my head on a table in the library than here with them.

"Liv, please," Elliot begged.

"You haven't been beaten by your own mother before. She was supposed to protect me, but instead, she hurt me and it was horrible. So if you think I can just forget what she did to me and try and pretend I've have had a happy life. But I'm not doing that to myself..." I spoke, as my voice broke at the end. I wiped a few tears from my cheeks, before walking out of his room, leaving the door wide open behind me.

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