The Beta's Unwanted Mate ONE-SHOT

To Live By, For Her

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"I can't explain the feeling well, but all I know is that everything hit me. I wouldn't have her, hold her, kiss her or love her anymore. My chest still aches with the loss of never to see her. But I remember the memories we shared, and knowing her, she'd be happy with that."
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When the funeral was over, I thought over what Olivia had said about her, My Love, My Patricia.

My breath shuddered and I did my best to hold back the unending tears I've shed since she passed. The constant ache in my chest felt heavy and my heart beat faster when I would realize I would never have her on this Earth.

But I had to be strong, because I knew somewhere out there, Patricia would gently scold me for crying when I shouldn't be and she'd say that I'm strong.

•••
"Alissa, what have I told you about crying? You're stronger than this, you have no need to shed tears for whatever mistakes or regrets that has already happened. I have faith in you, and if you ever feel like there's too much of anything, find strength in us, in me and in you. Believe in your self. Because I do."
•••

My Love was a brave and courageous woman and no one messed with her. Though I used to stutter and was a fearful mess when we first met, but after, I had started to believe in her words, now more than ever.

I knew she'd be proud of what I've accomplished so far on my own.

"I knew you could be strong. You always were in my eyes. My Alissa, love. Don't ever give up."

She'd say something like that.

So I blinked away the tears and even through the ache of losing my mate, I kissed my fingers and put them on her stone with her name engraved on it.

"My Love, I will continue to love you and live by for you. Because if I didn't," I laughed softly, "You'd have scolded me and given me one of your talks."

"I thank you, for being by my side, loving me and being my strength to stand." I stood up from my kneeling position and smiled, a few tears escaping some more, "Until we see one another again, I'll stand with strength you've taught me and with courage for what I've been through."

Few more tears fell and I told myself, it's ok to cry once in a while, because we all can't be brave like you ever were. Like you could have been.

Shaking my head, I wiped my tears and looked toward where my parents and Patricia's parents were.

They saw me, waved and took off after I'd nodded.

I'll be okay. I'll be fine.

I looked down at the stone and whispered my good-bye, "Till we meet again My Love. I will always love you. Not even the Mood Goddess will separate us when we meet again."

I didn't ignore the ache in my heart, because it was proof. Proof that she was real, that the memories were real, that everything that had happened was real. It hurt to think of her physically not being here, but I remembered, I'll get to see her one day.

And we'll never have to be separated again.

So I took the ache and walked away.

It was time to go home.

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