70's Porno Music

Beverly

July 7, 1973

We did our on 4th of July celebration. We had tons of hot dogs and drank beer in the comfort of Roper's home. It was perfect.

Roper took me out today. To Marty's.

We shared a peanut butter milkshake.

He's been washing me up and dressing me in his clothes which consists of big shirts and boxers. Today was a big white dress shirt and I grabbed one of his belts to create some kind of waist.

He won't let me take hot showers on my own. The only times I had to shoot up are early in the morning or when Roper forgets something at the grocery store.

I'm running low. Don really hasn't contacted me for a job.

I didn't put on any make up. My natural hair is thrown up in a puff on the top of my head.

I'm terrified. I've told Roper a lot. Probably more than I should have. But he continues to kiss my eyelids and run his hand on the top of my head.

Roper also took me to see a movie today. We had to travel to the other side of town to avoid any issues at the theater by Roper's apartment. It was run-down and the popcorn was stale but we were to only two in the theater besides a family that looked just like my own.

The ticket booth cashier asked me if I was okay after eyeing Roper.

Roper answered for me. "She's just fine. She's my girlfriend."

And that created a small argument in the hallway leading to Theater Number 11.

I can stand up for myself. Answering for me makes us look bad. Good thing the cashier didn't push further. Since when did I become his girlfriend?

Roper told me that he knows I don't need saving. He wanted the cashier to shut up and give of the tickets. He knows what we look like to other people.

"You're my f*cking girl, okay. Now can we watch the movie?"

So we did. It was something about an agents and a tarot card reader.

"This movie came out like six months ago."

Roper said and I told him that theaters likes these usually get movies late.

We spend a lot of the movie kissing. Roper told me he wants me to meet a man named Richard.

"I've showed him pretty polaroids of you. I really want you to meet him. He's very important to me."

I might bring him something baked. Roper said he loves brownies.

I want to be better to Roper. I know how good he is to me. He deserves a better me. I think I can do both. Be good for Roper and still make myself feel good. I can. I can.