We were all Mc countdown getting ready for perform dance the night away. These last couple of weeks have been really hectic. With busy schedule and getting a ton of hate from everyone I felt pretty lonely. Why you may ask? Well for one I didn't expect to get this much hate which is really stupid for me to think since everybody likes twice as 9 not ten. Also twice has this special bond that I really don't see myself being apart of. Yes I know twice are now my friends now but the way they talk to each other vs talking to me is different. I also started to get thoughts that twice may not like I mean they didn't ask for another member to join there group. Maybe there faking liking me or maybe there not.
I was back stage reading some the hates comments people have wrote about. Stuff like we don't want you in the group or your don't have any talent unlike the other members. The hate comments don't bother me as people might think they do but they do make me think is there at least one person out there that's like me. I haven't seen people who said that actually want me in the girl group. "Girls it's time to get on stage" Our manager said "I hope I won't get neglected" I said to myself as me and twice got into our position on stage.
*After the performance*
After the performance we quickly left mc to go to the airport to go to Japan to film bdz. We already had our stuff pack in the van. While in van me and Mina were jamming out to kara step. I feel like out of all the girls I the closet with Mina. We have alot of things in common like how we both quiet and probably the smartest out of the other girls. Also that ship that other girl made up a while ago has also in a strange way also brought us closer too. I guess with Mina I don't feel 100% lonely.
When we all got to the airport we put on our mask before we headed out. There were already fans outside. The first thing that came to my mind was how did they found which airport we was at. I mean does anyone wonder that?
Getting on our flight was much harder than I imagine. There were fan grabbing us by out shirts and arm. It was also hard to get to the plane when I literally couldn't cause there fans all around me trying to get a picture of me. That also made me wonder why the fans wanted a picture of me. They don't like me anyways. But whatever.
Once we finally got to the plane I decided to take a seat next to Nayeon since we haven't really bonded. While sitting next Nayeon I try to make small talk with her but every time I did she would ignore me or talk to other members. "Maybe she doesn't like me?" I thought to myself "Ugh don't think like this Sumi if you want Nayeon to like you then make her like you, yes! That what I do." I started to make a plan in my notes. Don't know if this going to work but if worth a try.
