Well, maybe this one's just a random rant. Dito ko lang kasi nalalabas, lahat ng mga tinatago kong nararamdaman.
Kung hindi naman kita mababago at Hindi ka din magpapabago, sige... Okay lang. Ikaw yan. Gawin mo na lang din Kung anu ginagawa mo sa mga dati mo, parang wala lang... Dun ka na sa cellphone mo, mas importante yun.
Tama nga Siguro sila, padalosdalos ako, kaya ganto tayo... "If you gave in easily Hindi ka Ganun bibigyan ng sobrang importance nung tao na yun" sorry ah, ganto kasi yun eh... Diba? Yan yung nararamdaman ko at masakit siya, kasi mahal kita eh. Tanga na naman Kung tanga, yoko ng ganto, yung walang natitira sa sarili ko...
Kahit di mo sabihin, nararamdaman kong Naiinis ka kasi ang immature ko mag isip. Yun lang yung way ko para mag lambing, pag pinagagalitan kita na magdala ka ng extra shirt, I really mean na magdala ka kasi yoko magkasakit ka. But in the end Ikaw pa din may hawak ng buhay mo, alalay lang ako sa mga bagay sayo.
No text? Yes, no text and even phone call saying sorry to me. I looked at you back after I've entered the gate, but then I just saw a guy looking at his cellphone minding a text, that's not mind, maybe it's just too important than me. I've wanted to cry a lot that time and don't what to attend my classes, but then I followed what you've said to take that shitty quiz.
All my classes were at bore, can't even concentrate to what their teaching. I've just focused to what I'm drawing, thinking I would be better in that way. I was really feeling dumb fucked at my chair drawing something not related to us, just a random art, I've wanted to draw. I found myself empty, while having our thirty-minute break, listening to my favorite music. I didn't talk much to Majo and Katrina feeling so uncomfortable in the classroom, making fake smiles.
How am I now? Hmmm, not really good, physically and emotionally worse. I'm walking all alone going to the chapel asking God, for something, for something you wouldn't want to happen for now. I'm really hoping that in the end you'll accept Him, again. Well, I really tried hard not to cry while I'm praying, and I guess it's just too unease.
I've also asked God saying these lines in my head "Man! Why do I love this man? He's not even loving You, but I know he'll come back to You, in time. Am I really loved by this man? Or he's just playing with my emotions?" Do I really need to deserve this fate? That's what I'm asking right now...
All my life, I've wanting to find love with the right person. To find love to what other people close to me can't give. I'm just a dumbass girl, who's unworthy for love, that's what I see myself for, living in this world.
Ang babaw man ng dahilan, I guess, I really love you and will always love you, kaya ako ganto...
