Crush: A burning desire to be with someone who you find attractive and extremely special.
It's funny how one person can mean so much to you. They're all you can think about. When you wake up in the morning, during the day, and the last person on your mind at night. No matter how much you try to get over them, you just never can.
To think over a year ago, you was just another person I went to school with. The day I knew I was attractive to you, everything seem to move in slow motion. You was standing there with your friends, looking oh so casual. You moved your hair out of your face, while laughing at something your friend said. Then out of nowhere someone pushed me and I realized I needed to get to class. Throughout class all I could think about was will I be able to see you again. When I should have been focusing on not failing my test. Every since then I looked for you in the halls. All those books seem so relatable now. For a moment I thought about making my life a movie.
I may have not known you personally, but I knew the little things. Like when your nervous you scratch the side of your nose. How your eyes are a light shade of blue with a hint of grey. How your the pitcher of our school baseball team.
As months went by my feelings for you grew. You made everyday a good day. I dream to hear you say. I like you too. To jump in your arms after you win a game. To eat lunch with you and your friends. For you to be my boyfriend. But like rain, I fell for you.
I couldn't hold in so much emotions. So I told you, you said you had baseball to focus on. Which I respect, I mean I don't play a sport. But if I did I would have probably said the same thing. As the weeks went by I didn't know what to feel. Nothing changed , you was still on my mind. So to walk past you in the hall and see you unaffected by the situation hurt. That my chances to be yours was slipping away.
I think that's when I realize that you weren't some guy I like. But a guy who have capture my heart. The longer I sit around wondering, the higher my anxiety and self-conscious got. My mind start to make all these horrible thoughts. Am I good enough, pretty enough, or am I your preference.
So you sit around unaware that you have my heart in your hands. In the end, it hurts me each day to not know if you feel the same way. I guess I will never know, unless you get this letter.
So when I say your on my mind, I mean it. Because you will forever be on my mind,
Connor Skidmore
