Try to Fix You (Cameron Dallas)

Part 4

"I-I'm so sorry, Megan" Cameron says.

"I don't want you to lead me on, thinking that you were a nice guy." I say glancing down at the floor.

"I am!" He defends.

"Just go back to your Barbie dolls and go away." I mumble. I shut the door on him and go up to my room and take a shower.

When I'm done I put on sweatpants and a cutoff.

Then, I go into the kitchen and eat a salad. It's really lonely here.

By the time I finish eating and watch a season of Gossip Girl on netflix I go to my room and get into my bed.

Finally I drift to sleep.

~

The next morning I get up and put on skinny jeans and a nirvana muscle shirt.

I walk to my bathroom and but on minimal makeup and brushed out my hair.

I also put makeup on my scars so they will be hidden.

I walk downstairs and eat a bowl of cereal.

Before I knew it the bus had came and left without me.

"Crap." I mumble running outside.

"You need a ride?" I hear Cameron yell from his car that has stopped outside my house.

I don't say anything as I get into his car and roll my eyes.

It is silent the whole way there.

~

Once we reach the school I run in before Cameron can catch up.

I go to my locker, get my books and get to my class.

"So today you will be continuing the project." The teacher says. I turn around and walk up to Cameron.

"Let's get this over with." I mumble.

I sit next to him and we work on the project, barley saying anything.

~

Finally lunch has come along so I walk out into the cafeteria. I look around at everyone giving me dirty looks. What the heck did I do now?

I sit at a corner table, alone.

"Aw, look who is sitting alone?" I hear a voice say sarcastically. I look up to see the same girls with Cameron and some of his friends.

"Aw look who got a new nose job." I fire back.

"Okay, fatty. I have you know I don't do nose jobs. And by the way, who is getting all the boys? Me. So why don't you shut your mouth and continue eating your donuts." She laughs.

I look at Cameron who is staring at the ground. Again, doing nothing about this.

"Suck my ass." I yell and flip her off as I walk out the cafeteria. Wow, I was so pissed off I actually stood up for myself.

I walk to the bathroom and look at myself in the mirror. She is right. I am fat.

I immediately feel itchy on my wrist. I can't itch them or my makeup will smear off.

It continues to drive me insane all day until I finally get home and wash off the makeup.

I stare at them for a while. Wow, this is how pathetic I am.

Tears stream down my face.

I started cutting when I was about 13 years old. My life was complete crap. I just got a old bobby pin and took my first cut. Crying. But I couldn't stop after that. It spread. First on my wrist. Then my whole arms. Then my stomach. Then my thighs. My mom never found out and my dad never cared.

I grab my blade and dig it into my wrists. The warm liquid soothes my itch.

This is it. This is what my life has come to. Everyday, a fresh slice on my body.